Jin

Gay, London and Oriental. Take A Look ;)
2004-01-06 02:31:49 (UTC)

Endings and New Beginnings

December 4th- I had just finished uni at around 5.30ish and
got home around 6.20. Was online for a bit till Phil
messaged me. He wanted me to go clubbing with him and I
said yeah why not. I got ready to go and met him around
9ish. I met him outside G-A-Y bar because we were going to
go clubbing later. We had a few drinks, talked kissed etc.
We got the club around 11ish, went to the upstairs bar and
drank there. We stayed there for the majority of the night
but popped downstairs from time to time. We practically
danced the whole night away and it was such a fantastic
night- depsite them playing Dirrty and Me against the Music
like 3 times ¬_¬. We left there around 4am, he went and got
some takeaway from some shop, we made our seperate ways and
went home.

December 15th- Met up a few people for a drink at the
Turnpike in Welling. I met Ryan there first but others came
later. Turned out that he was Lloyds in Bexleyheath earlier
with another group of "friends". I met him there spoke to
him about life and love etc. He had another 6 week break
and well he wasn't doing much else. Emily, Vicky and Becky
shortly came and we all sat down and spoke. Ordered a few
drinks and shared stories.
Later Maneesh and a bunch of old school friends came and we
all greeted eachother after not seeing eachother for so
long. Shared stories and had a few drinks. Some were very
talkative, the rest just tried to contribute to the chit-
chat. Finished around 11 and then I took a cab home. Nice
to see everyone.

December 18th - A week before Christmas and I needed to do
some Christmas Shopping. Went uptown around 3ish and didn't
have much of a clue to buy for my family. I went around
alot the cosmetic stores to see what I could get for my
sister and mum. I spent ages backtracking because I was
tempted to buy stuff for myself because the sales were
starting early. Trouble is that they didn't have any in my
size ¬_¬. I eventually got something for my mum, sis and my
friend Emily who was having like a Birthday dinner today.
Couldn't really make it because I had to get stuff =. Was
quite busy but I managed.
Once I got home, I got a text from Shawn. I've known Shawn
for like 7 months now and I've spoken to him now and again.
He invited me to go with him to the cinema in the new year.
I thought ok then I will, I've always wanted to meet new
people and it could be fun. I never really looked at him as
anything else but a friend, but over the next few days, I
grew even more fonder of him.

December 20th-Went out with Phillip again. He was working
for the past 2 weeks full time and this was a rare time
when he had off. It was the last time G-A-Y was gonna be
opened till new year eve. We did the usual that Saturday-
drunk, kissed, drunk some more and danced. It was an okish
night-Alistair Griffin was there and he performed, he was
kinda shit but oh well. It was the last time I was going to
see Phillip but oh well. It was ok but the music wasn't all
that great. Thursdays are alot better. Luv ya Phil ^^.

December 25th- OK this had to be the worse Christmas Day
ever. That morning at around 2-3ish I spoke to Nahum. He
was talking about the events of what happened upto the day
we last saw eachother. He was going on about the
relationships he had, places he had been and it was really
nice hearing from him. He said he still liked me and I was
flattered, he was good and thats all I want him to be. Woke
up around 2pm and turned on the telly to watch Top of the
Pops, wasn't anything special. Went downstairs and
basically nothing was happening. My dad was watching TV and
so was my Mum. My sis was on the comp but it was such a
boring day. It was the day that Christmas died at this
house. Dinner could have been confused for any other day of
the year, no one came around and it was so crappy. It was a
rare time when we actually was in the same house, at the
same time and no one really cared. When i think of how
great the year has been for me, despite the bad times, I
just think that a bad Christmas seemed minimal to me.

26-30th- Over these few days, I've been mostly thinking
about what the whole year has meant to me. Noticeably (and
still mentioned) was the way I looked. When I went to the
gym I lost alot of weight and people have commented on the
difference it makes. By doing that I've gained alot of self
confidence that I lacked in 2002 and I finally am able to
feel comfortable in how I am. Going on the "various"
outtings with certain people has certainly developed my
perception on how people are, and to better myself as a
person. I've learnt to love my friends alot more and
appreciate them. I've grown wiser, not so naive and not to
rush into things. I know that I'm not as hideous as I am,
and there are a few people who made my year so good. The
recent event of Shawn inviting me out in the new year, has
just reinstated my hope for a relationship and love. The
year is the year i've grown the most, in terms of bettering
myself and knowing many people. Amongst my group of friends
there is no one that has a similar experience than me, but
now that I have the experiences I hope that I can help
someone who is going through what I've been through. I will
always be happy, no matter what happens to me because my
friends will always remind me of how much I love them...

December 31st-The final closure to the eventful year. My
cousin's birthday was on the 1st but she was to celebrate
it today. Most of my cousins were there and so were the
rest of my family. Lots of food, lots of noise and stuff.
Later my relatives were to go to Southend to Casino and
left me to look after my cousins. I couldn't get drunk or
go out with my mates because of this. It was ok, I put them
to bed and that was it really. I tried texting people but
the system was down. Called Dazzy for the first time in the
new year and that was it. Nice to hear from him and talking
to a few people on msn. That was it to my year, December
was pretty pants apart from a few occasions. Goodbye 2003
and say hi to 2004!




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