seventurns15

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2003-12-28 21:32:44 (UTC)

Consultation

I bit my tongue again
and cried out for mercy
as the tip became untamed.
The dark red liquid trickled into my mouth
as I tightly compressed my lips together
holding in my unacceptable array of dreams.
You finally pause to take a breath
between the 'then' and 'now's of your perfect
experiences,
while I muster the energy for a polite smile and nod,
so I won't have to split the seal of my mouth
and drip stain onto your clean slate of perfection.
Are you happy? Do you believe what you are saying?
I repeatedly bite my tongue again and again
ripping away the order that man and nature have tried so
hard to recreate.
You are constantly enthralled by the sound of your own voice
as you percieve us closer than ever before,
but to me we are separated by a million miles of
misunderstanding.
Each word within your breath stings more than a slap across
my face
and makes me shrink further into my locked core.
You boast that everyone should live by your rules and
consult your divinity,
but how do you know I'm wrong?
My tongue is like a ballon being filled with too much air
because at some point it will burst
due to pressure from people that expect too much
and all that will remain will be torn pieces of a once
beautiful creation.
Can I trust you?
I want to share my happiness with you,
but as I open my mouth to speak
you turn your back on me as if the conversation has ceased
before it has even begun.
I thought that you were ready to understand.
So I'm back to occupying imaginary comfort for you.
I smile and nod in between the 'then' and 'now's of
your perfect experiences,
while biting my swollen tongue as it pulsates with force to
be set free.

c.dunham


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