robertncheek

Finding Nirvana
2003-12-25 06:55:32 (UTC)

Merry F-ing Christmas

Well boys and girls, seems I was able to update after all.
I am having a great time this holiday season, let me
tell you. I began my day with a lovely run in the rain. I
told myself no matter what, at least a mile every day. So
I got up this morning and dragged my ass out into the rain
adn mud and made a superb showing under the conditions of
a mile and 2 tenths. As you can see, I'm committed.
I came back to the house to find my family, in their
usual holiday cheerfulness, screaming at each other and
fighting over stupid little things. *sigh* I love the
holidays. I dunno if anyone caught "Malcolm in the Middle"
last Sunday but that is essentially my family. Makes me
wonder if I'll miss the fighting some day when I have my
own Christmas.
Then my day got so much brighter when *drumroll* I had
to go to work, closing the store on Christmas Eve. And the
kicker, the woman who was supposed to close with me,
Sharon, the one who hates me for not putting up wither her
shit, the very thing that attracts other women to me ;),
decided she wasn't going to stay until close but rather
leave at 5. *wow what a run on sentence* So not only did I
close on Christmas Eve but I closed by myself. So I got to
handle $600 in business by myself. It was lovely.
My day got better and better when, after closing and
leaving at 9 instead of 8 because I got ass fucked once
again by the system, I found out that I couln't chill with
Ashley tonite after all because her dad's a huge dick. Now
I know your thinking, well what an ass he's pissed cuz he
didn't score. But its not that. The fact is, its been so
long since I've been able to be with a girl who is
absolutely crazy about me. Its strange that the thing I
desire most in the world, isnt sex, but rather to be able
hold someone who geniunely wants to be with me and no
where else. Really, and I have freely admitted this
before, I just want someone to share my bed. I want to
fall asleep and wake up next to someone who I am nuts over
and who is crazy for me, or at least, just wants to be
there. I want to be able to hold someone who i care about.
Its been a really long time since I've been able to do
that and I want it so much. I've...I got no way to really
release that energy and the ability to release it is not
really under my control I guess but I dunno. I'm lost.
Ok well after that rant, lol, anyway, so I came home
and my family had made dinner around 9 and didn't make
anything for me, so I got to go spend money I really don't
have to buy dinner. So, my Christmas Eve dinner was a
cheesesteak and fries from Bodie's, lovely.
Then, as my mother was about to go to bed, she and my
sister began to fight and rant and rave about how no
matter what we would be disappointed about our gifts.
Christmas is such a lovely time. The people at school
can't understand how I can hate being home so much and why
I like school more than home. Hopefully this is a taste of
why lol.
Tom. is looking to be a great day. My sister is
dragging me out of bed at 10 to open gifts *what are we 10
again?* and this means that I have to get up at 930 to get
my running and shower done before then. Later, I get to
have dinner with the white trash I call family followed by
a day of work from 4-10. What a life. How many days until
Feb 3? Can't wait to be back in NY. I need a drink. When's
New Years?
More later...




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