PaulH

Why Not?
2003-12-24 04:19:24 (UTC)

December 23rd....

Well, Kim thinks I think she hates me. Not true at all, I
just kinda took shit the wrong way, because I don't know
what to think anymore. She likes me, yet rejects me, and
says she still likes me...I'm confused to all hell about
it, but hey, nothing new there...I'm always confused about
my life and the aspects that lie within it...but who cares,
I guess...I'm still here and I'm still living which only
counts I guess.

News:

Well, like I said, Kim thinks I think she hates me. That's
not true at all, I just think she is getting sort of pissed
more and more when I talk 2 her...just seems that way, but
i guess its not true. But whatever...I guess what happpens
with us happens and can't happen any other way.

Other News:

I GOT NEAR 100 DOLLARS IN MY POCKET AND NO POT TO
BUY!!!!!!!! What the mother fuck?!?!?!?!?! it's so messed
up...tried getting a hold of peoples, and it didn't
work...and i desperately NEED TO SMOKE POT! or trip on
some acid or shrooms, whatever comes first. But yeah,
Chris is sleeping over 2nite, and I was planning on having
some weed for us to smoke, but that didn't work out quite
as I planned it.

More News:

The party list goes on and on. I got around 12-15 peoples
coming, and my basement really isn't that big. So we'll
prolly just go off and wonder around the neighborhood...or
just head down to the park to have some smokage, pot and
ciggs, since i'll be getting a new pack that
evening...SCORENESS!!!! well, neways, i also just watched
Office Space...what a quality movie. Newhos, i REALLY hope
the party isn't beat. I mean, everyone there should really
know each other, and if not, they will by the end of the
night. We all have shit in common and all, so it won't be
that hard. Theres gonna be mad musicians of all
instruments in an ordinary band...Like, 3 or so guitarists,
hopefully a bassist, and 2 drummers...It should be
fun...lots of different styles and shit, 2.

Bore U 2 Hell News:

I don't know where Kim gets that I think I hate
her...prolly my last entry where it said "Whether we go out
or not, I don't want to be on 'I hate you' terms with
her'". I didn't mean it like that at all...I just meant
that I hope she doesn't hate me and all, cuz that would be
kinda bad...didn't think she hates me, though...damn
perception of people and usually being wrong, much like
mine! neways, I NEED POT TO SMOKE!!!! have i said that
yet? cuz i really do.


Well, neways, this break should be cool. 2 weeks off from
school, which i DIRELY need...beyond anybody could ever
imagine...except the fact that it's christmas, it should be
an amazing break...one that i'll want to remember, but
prolly won't...heh...damn thc and it's memory fucker-upper
ability. I'm really confused on why the hell Kim is so shy
when she is around me in person...I really don't get
it...if she likes me, i would think she would want to show
it...but oh well, fuck it, my new years resolution is to
get that girl to not be shy around me. Oh, and apparently,
there isn't another guy. I was just buggin out for no
reason and made up shit cuz i hadn't had a ciggarette all
day, and went on rambling about an imaginary problem. i
guess she's just not ready for another relationship? eh,
who the hell knows.(sides Kim, but she won't explain to me
again cuz apparently i missed it the first time...damn me
being burnt out.)Oh well, no matter what, I'm gonna keep
trying for this girl, unless something huge happens to make
me all like, hate her...but hopefully that won't happen.

I think that's enuff bitchin for one night...I have more to
say, but I really don't think u peoples want to read it.

Until next time and for the in between time,

....this has been paul....
...2 WEEKS OFF OF SCHOOL!...
..unknowing where I stand..
.drugs keep my sanity in proportion.
lAter




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