suicidal_punk_slut

love is shit and life sux cock
2003-12-22 03:46:20 (UTC)

I am agnostic but i hang on a cross

God is life boring. thats one thing i miss about nick. at
least i had someone to talk to and hang ou with, someone
who'd take me places to meet his friends and hang out and
get fucked up but. now im just fucked and bored lol. and
making out, thats always fun but i guess i sucked at it
since he never wanted to usually. or maybe it was my fat
ass and ugly face. i dont care im pretty damn desperate but
im not that pathetic, i dont really like him anymore. as a
friend he is cool but other than that......no way. he's to
apathetic and seems to forget that what he does affects
more people than just him. i would never make out with him
again,(pause for his cry of joy if he heard that). Even if
i wanted to i dont think i could, when he touched me to get
my attention recently it made my skin crawl. which means i
dont really like him and i am definantly not comfortable
around him.god life is shit whats the meaning of being
bored and sad and in pain all life, only to make it ok for
a while before it comes crashing down on your stupid ass
once again leaving you more fucked up then you were before.
god i need someone to make out with lol. if only someone
wanted to with me....but alas, no. i am to freaky and funny
looking oh well ill just deal with being alone. maybe i
would try to make out with nick(if he made the first move,
never gonan happen), nothing like i like him that way or
anything. just cause i like to make out but i dont think i
would. he'd think i was still pathetic and i still wanted
to be with him. i dont think ill ever want that again. not
worth it. plus he wasnt that good of a kisser and for
someone alot more experienced than me at least i got him to
have an orgasm 1 or 2 times which is 1 or 2 times more than
he did for me. plus i always got interupted or he couldnt
keep it up. maybe im not that good but hes the only perosn
id ever even kissed, and hes fucked a bunch of chicks
prolly at least a couple so who has more of the fault here?
i think its pretty much me lol for being ugly but W/E. i
dont give a flying fuck ill find someone that is despertae
enough to want me that isnt to disgusting to be with and
all will be well lol. no ill probably end up being alone
and killing myself. o well. im gonna read about religions
now cause im bored and might wanna be wiccan i doubt it
though. later.
music: screeching weasel, propagandhi, distillers,
dillinger four, guttermouth, blink 182
mood: annoyed bored and shitty




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