Amnesia

dude
2003-12-17 08:09:12 (UTC)

Court is in session...

The verdict is in
...from Creeds song
(Don't remember which one)

The verdict though, I've finally decided why I don't want
to hang with TDC anymore. It's Chris. He's aggravating. Tim
can get a little boring and stale sometimes, but he's
atleast real and fun to do stuff with. As long as stuff is
being done Tim is the guy to do that with.

Solution: Try different and most bizzare clicks. I already
tried Oscar and Christina, and hung out with Sylwia and
this one friend of hers Vicky. Liz is always fun. Hmmm... I
should try to hang with Kara one of these days. She's cool.
Maybe Kara me and Christina. Kara lives far though, I
think.

I'm gonna try to be nicer then ever. More fitting in, more
interested in other peoples stories and lives. This not
only gives me something to do, but also sets me up for
further, more in dept friendships. This would be great for
a B-day Bash.

Speaking of which, I have no idea what to do and the
thought depresses me a bit. That and the holidays. I talked
about this shortly with Steph. The whole stereotypical
holiday of warm feelings, and family gatherings. My family
couldn't survive the boredom without a tv. And then often
we can't agree on a channel. (I must get more books for
that time period! I'll finish the invisible man today.)
Then there's new years, and you're a loser if you hang at
home with your parents. I prabobly won't have anywhere to
go so I'll just go to sleep before the celebration starts.
Somehow I think I keep reading or listening to the radio
attentively at this time period. This time I might just
sleep. Then again, everyone is getting drunk, wasted,
plastered, e.t.c... I wouldn't want to do anything with my
bro's since everyone there will be in this state. Besides,
I'm not one for the polish mafia. The whole, "What you
don't even drink champaigne on New Years," surprises alot
of people. Well whatever.
Then there's the birthdays. Eric's having a surprise party
hosted by Liz and Chris on the second of January. Arthur
and Daniel on the 28th, Chris on the 23, me on the 19th. Oh
me.
The big birthday dilema. I have never had a GOOD party.
Ever. Sure I've had fun, but the more I think about it, the
more I think I just put myself in a state of mind where I
think I'm having fun. Or I am under a stereotypical state
of mind right now, where I think in order for a party to be
fun there must be plenty of people, food, and lots of
dancing or something like that. I don't know. Since it is
my golden birthday I kinda did want to do something big.
Financially I cannot right now, but this job that I'm
suppose to call for training today might just change that,
and how. I hope it all works out. I'm a bit worried though
since I told so many freaking people that I might have
jinxed it, but then again what do you expect, for me not to
tell anyone within such long a time when the interview was
so weird? Couldn't help myself. Well, we'll see.

I still give into temptation though. Sometimes if I get the
chance to hang with one of those guys, or someone, or if
they have an idea of extending the hang, doing something
not really necessary, then I often give in. I think it's
starting to change. Probably since I started hanging with
other people and doing my own thing. Well, ENOUGH...