brkunsulofglss

would the world stop spinning
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2003-12-13 07:52:59 (UTC)

when the winter breeze blows threw you

i just deleated like 40 post that were about aften and i
while we were together,or not together,or whatever.
basicly a hole shit load of post i didn't need around.
maybe it's just the cold meds ontop of lack of sleep...
all i wanna do is cry..
i'm seeing caela sunday and i'm terrified, it's all i can
think about really.
i just talked to courtney about it,i told her i wanted
caela back,that i'd be willing to do about anything...she
told me to go for it...if only it were that easy.
i also just went through my email box...in the process
reading alot of old things...it got me wondering,mainly
because i couldn't read what i was writing back.
did she know then how much i truely truely loved her?
i know i was inconciderate,but did she have the slightest
idea what was really going through my head?
did she have any idea how scared i got? i mean what
happened with us was enough to break me right in half,
and it literally took everything in me not to run.
i was so in love i couldn't move tho....i almost never ever
wanted to meet someone like her,because i knew it would
hurt this bad...and i knew right away what it would be like.
lol.. it's not natural to fall that in love that fast,but
hey caela is the one i did it with,and i relize the depth
of my stupidity more every time my heart beats.


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