sweetaddiction

all i want to do right now is..

all i want to do right now is move home. move home and be
around people that not only love me, but who know me.
thats is. i miss it. i miss the life i had before i met
that fucking bitch. and i miss who i was. what i stood
for. however gross and immature. i was fucking happy. and
i knew nothing of pain like i know now. now i know too
much. then i knew nothing. i want to be fucking ignorant.
i want to be happy. i want to be selfish and stupid and
happy. god damnit. why did i go to ambers that day. why
did i ever meet her. i hate her. i hate her in more ways
than any words will ever do justice. i hate her. i fucking
despise her and i never ever ever EVER want to speak to
her again. i blame her. for where i am. and what im doing.
and the fact that i hate myself for the choices that i
have made. romantic idealism. i fucking hate her. shes
stupid and not nice and mean and fucking retarded. why did
i meet her. 2 years of my life gone. fucked up. fucking
LOST. the people. the experiences. where would i be right
now if shed never happened. fuck. fuck. learning
experience. my goddamned ass. i didnt need to learn this.
let alone KNOW THIS EXISTED. feel this. feel her spitting
on me that night and telling me i was shit. yeah. NO.
fucking FUCK HER. I HATE HER. fuck her. fuck her for lying
to me and letting me fall in love withher and her family.
she took it all away and then said, "you only have a
broken heart youll heal". she doesnt fucking know me at
all. know who i was then. who i am now. what ive been
through. maybe thats all i lost, but fuck dude youve taken
THAT for GRANTED YOUR WHOLE FUCKING BULLSHIT LIFE. FUCK
YOU. you dont know. talk to me like im 5. yeah fuck you.
fucking abusing toxic 2 year relationship what the fuck am
IIIIIII so upset about. fucking bitch. i hate her. i
fucking hate her. bullshit. shes all bullshit. and im not
stupid. yet i act like i am. like im nieve. wheni knew the
whole time.a nd i know now. fucking bitch. yeah. no. im
not answering my phone. and i NEVER FUCKING WILL. stop
calling me. get the fuck away from me. i wish i never
fuckingmet you. youve done nothing but cause me pain and i
did nohting but make you happy. fucking mean. fuckingEVIL.
EVIL PERSON. i may be drunk but i hate you when im sober.
bitch. bitch. bitch. BITCH.