CielDeVanille

Ma Monde
Ad 2:
2003-12-08 05:03:21 (UTC)

Sunday

I don't know where to start. I've never had a diary. I've
never had that security of knowing that I can vent without
someone turning on me. This is all my life has exisited
of. Being fucked over one too many times to keep intact
with myself. However, I need something permanent to look
back on to see where I came from. Well, we'll start with
this. I am seventeen years old, a Senior in High School,
and absolutely terrified of leaving on my own. I got a
scholarship to Arkansas Tech. Am I happy? Hell yeah! Full
tuition. I just wish I wasn't so stupid, and that I could
raise my ACT score 2 more points! TWO MORE! What else do I
need to ask of. ::sigh:: But, I take the ACT Saturday. I
haven't had one free minute to study. To be completly
honest, I feel screwed over. I quit my Pre-Cal Class. So
my only hope of remembering any math skills has been
crashed down because of my stupidity. Although, being a TA
is excellent time to catch up on sleep that I didn't get
the night before. Like now, it's 10:57. I should be
sleeping. But I can't. I need to get my thoughts out. This
is why I started a journal. Because I need something that
I can just lay my thoughts out on so I can sleep soundly.
I have a best friend. His name is Dan, but sometimes I
don't feel like he gets me. And I'm not a simple person. I
know you can't talk back to me, but this way I can feel
like my thoughts will always be here without having to
ponder on them day after day. Well, this is enough for
tonight. I shall return soon. I don't get much free time,
but I will definently try to make it.


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