Amber

Just Another Day In Paradise
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2003-12-03 04:22:13 (UTC)

Paradise...sometimes..

Yeah, today started off excellent, I stayed awake in
Algebra again! yay me! hehe French was fun, same old thing,
I love it, and though it stays the same it never gets old.
Mrs. Camden is possibly the best teacher I've ever had.
English was....well..less then intriguing we'll say. It
seems as though I may have lost a few "friends" or just
realized that they have no idea who they are and they just
follow the mold so many have made for them. At lunch I did
something for a friend when she asked..how funny it is that
the very person I do the favor for might be the very person
I lost....and how amazing that it is to a guy. Her
first "love" how unbelievably heartbreaking...I even knew
somewhere in my heart that things would be okay with them
and I would be left outside...it's cold here without her
but I'd stay here a million years longer than I would stay
with someone that I don't know anymore. It's odd, this
feeling used to hurt..but I've shut out hurt... there's no
room for caution in life...take chances...fall but always
rise again with the knowledge that you've learned a new
lesson! I enjoyed myself at the concert...a few times I
had to catch tears before they fell because I watched those
little kids or what seems to me to be like little kids and
I realized where I came from musically. Where my musical
birth took place and it was an amazing reality for me. I
feel helpful today, I tutored a guy...well I guess you can
call it tutoring, I helped him a whole lot with his junior
project, Research papers! EEK! hehe, We're not done yet,
but if I can really improve his grade it will be an
unbelievable feeling! And I loaned my mouthpiece to a
seventh grader at the concert...she was so quiet and
little...I wonder if I was like that..ever...Well Mommy
goes to the hospital soon and I'm terrified..she jokes that
we should pray for a doctor with a "steady hand" because
he'll be cutting her neck...talk about morbid humor! The
wonders that praying can do! Lately I've realized how
lucky I am..my family, Erik, my friends, music..they're all
amazing and I've learned so much from them...a person with
so much can't help but fear losing something right? But
wouldn't fear be caution? hehe What an intriguing
cycle.....Well that seems to be all for today..


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