Leah

Ramblings Of A Confused Mind
2003-11-22 18:22:52 (UTC)

wo u the show wouldnt go on

i'm aware of my flaws, i'm aware that maybe i dont always
try hard enough to make myself happy. i'm aware that i'm
not the best at everything or that i could probably be a
better person if i demanded it of myself.


i'm aware.


but how many times have you been aware of something that
you chose to ignore?


maybe i'm painfully naive. ignorance is bliss.
maybe i'm painfully aware of the hardships in life. the
pointlessness to go on.


or maybe jus maybe its cus i hurt

i am not a cry for pity. i am not the girl you may think i
am.
i am not much different from you. i breathe, cry, sing,
laugh. i dance, simle, breakdown, trip &fall.


i'm not perfect. all my life, perfection was demanded. ive
fell behind. i fell so far behind. and sometimes when you
start to lose the race, you give up all together.

the world will someday stop spinning and THAT DAY it won't
matter how many cars you had or how much money you had in
the bank or how many SCARS YOU HAD ON YOUR FUCKING BODY.


so why doesnt the world give up?!

FUCK THE WHOLE SELFISH WORLD. we kill each other. for no
reason. at all.


maybe they were in your way. or maybe they pissed you off.
or maybe it was by chance that your bullet fired from your
gun and hit their heart, bullseye.


we go to war, fighting a battle on our arms and on
battlegrounds. with razor blades and guns. fight yourself
or fight someone else.

LIVING should include: getting drunk on the weekend, making
giant snowmen in the backyard, eating chips in the middle
of the store and returning the package to the shelf, doing
cartwheels in the grass, kissing in the rain.

LIVING is not money, or cars, or your job, or workin out.

because love is the most amazing feeling &this boy is the
most amazing thing &there is no happiness like the
happiness gained from late night conversations secrets
whispered and i love you's shared.

i guess im jus a dreamer n i jus dream my life away
yesterday, love was such an easy game to play.now I need a
place to hide away.oh, I believe in yesterday

anyways ima head out.. im gettin up early i wish u would
have answered when i called but itll b ok.




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