Claudia

once again
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2003-11-17 06:47:31 (UTC)

today and tomorrow and forever

Wow I haven't written in here for some time now. I'm
online alot and I go to type in this address and I stop. I
think it's the whole having to admit to myslef that there
are things in my life that I have to write about in a diary
that gets me. And then i get scared and I dont' want to
write because I dont' want to think about those things and
admit that I"m worried or scared or whatever the case might
be.

I have my new health insurance now. Tuesday I have my
first doctor appointment with my new DR. Thank Gosh too,
I'm almost out of my heart perscriptions. I'm excited
about this...not excited but I'm happy I can goto the Dr
now. I have several things I"m looking forward to
discussing with him about myself.

I'm not feeling so good emotionally right now or lately for
that fact. Don't want to talk about it, dont' want to think
about it. Really dont want it around me at all, but hey I
have no choice in that.

Today my sister and Mike got into the worst fight ever.
She almost left and then tried making him leave and
wouldn't let the kids talk to him. She needs help, I don't
think her medications are working right anymore. Neither
does he and he's sick of this. She mean to all of us
everyday, so much that he thinks about divorce and I think
about living with my brother. They talked and yelled and
she degraded him for 5 hours after that tonight. I don't
know what's happening with that. I'm sure he'll fill me in
on it later tomorrow or what not. I love him though, he's
done so much for me and my family that I don't want to
loose him. She doesn't realize that he's wonderful to her
and she doesn't treat him nor the rest of us very well
anymore.

So things are things and life is life around here. What's
new? still no new love interest around in my life.
NOthing new there, I'm soooo pretty every one tells me but
no one ever likes me. So, I"ll be lonely through the
holidays once more,,,what's new huh? Ohwell, but tomorrow
will continue.................


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