pensive problematic

a thought in the mind of her
2003-10-27 05:59:58 (UTC)

written: 21 . october . 2003

all the tension i had last night, left in my sleep. so
much happened so quickly i should've been scared...
but i just didn't feel safe...
i never really do anymore.
all the rage and emotion comes from where?
even if i knew i don't think i would do much to prevent it.
because i don't think, or i don't believe that i've been
doing anything wrong...
i don't deserve this, i'm not this person, i shouldn't let
myslef be this person. i'm not weak, i'm not weak
I'M NOT WEAK, don't let me be weak!
i need a way out, i wan't a way out, a safe way out,
a nice way out...nothing disturbing, nothing scary.
i want to be at peace again, i hate being scared of
someone i once trusted.
if i were someone else giving me advice, i would say just
get out, just let it be known that you want out.
and if they cannot respect that, then you never belonged
there anyways...
i don't even want to help anymore, i almost don't care, i
just want out, just let me out.