Aunjaleis

Alpha Aunja-leis
2003-10-14 02:18:22 (UTC)

It starts with an earthquake- snakes and airplanes- Aunjaleis is not afraid

If you know what refernece I am making with the title you
are a damn genius!
The family drama has like gone up 10 levels. It's so much
drma I can't publish it online! That my friends is DRAMA!
Well, over the weekend I traveled with my gay husband to
Cleveland to see Mr. Big in his comedy thing.
WHAT WAS I THINKING?!
The time with Steve was stupendious! I love that man. He
is the closes thing to unconditional love with a man
without sexing him up. We had Starbucks and LIFE WAS GOOD!
While in Cleveland we went to Tower City Mall. The
building is pretty, but as far as substance in stores - it
is OKay at best. I did purchase a ring and a necklace with
my name- so now complete strangers can mispronounce my
name. :)
And now for the story you all have been waiting
for.....cue music..
Mr. Big-
We stood in the line and he walked out- I thought he had
no idea we were coming. He saw me and he winked..EUPHORIA..
It was really cool because his pics were hanging around
the lobby and I said to Steve- I love that man- with all
his flaws I love him still. So then, He came over to talk
to us and said he could have gotten us free tickets and I
thought well shit you don't call me1
So, then, we had KILLER seats. I would recommend this show
to everyone! It was a laugh riot! Especially after 3
beers. Steve and I were looking smashing as usually. :)
So, after the show- we wait for him and he talks with us.
And that was it. Around 1 am we walk back to our hotel
drunk and smiling like homeless people in love. - WHATEVER
THAT MEANS..
So, we watched some tv and went to bed. We had some Browns
fans staying at out hotel - Sports fans are the oddest
people on earth- I think.
So, the rest of the drive back I kept thinking of him- all
the "what ifs" all the things that I oculd have done-
REGRETS- Then Bonnie Raits song came on "I can't make you
love me" Wow that jacked me up. What I feel for him isn;t
butterflies. What I feel for him doesn't make me jittery
and uncomfortable. WHat I feel for him all the love I have
is like a bed with cotton sheets and a down comforter. My
love for him is like a pair of baggy sweatpants on a cold
winter day sipping hot coco. As I said to Steve I only
hope that I can love someone so purely and completely as I
loved him. It scares me- because I think when I am dying-
He will be on my mind- and that scares me. In this life he
and I will not be- but I hope that there is an afterlife,
because he is the one I would chose to be with - if the
choice were mine to make.
So, after Cleveland I went to see my brother in Columbus
and we had lunch. I love my brother- he is my stability in
this life- he is such a good person. ;)
TheN, i DROVE TO yELLOW sPRINGS TO Tarin at a woman's
concert. Basically, it was a room full of lesbains singing
great song! GO SISTERS GO. At one point I was like Um
Tarin do y ou think they think we are a couple? But, the
singers were really deep. I think lesbians are deeper than
most people..? This one singer sang about pain and I liked
it. After that I drove back to Cincy ti join reality.
Reality didn't miss me, and I certainly didn't miss
reality. I did a lot of praying this weekend. I prayed I
guess for deliverance and I pleaded with God to grant me
some peace in this life and to see me through- etc etc And
that very night I saw some light at the end of the tunnel.
HIs name is Joseph and I think he he might be a date this
weekend. Maybe I am starting to see ome peace- Thank you
God! My faith is everything and it's all I have. I have my
claws in faith and I plead for it not to shake me loose!




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