bluemoon

The crazy world of me
2003-10-07 07:01:13 (UTC)

LIFE IS PRETTY DAMN GOOD AT THE MOMENT

SO NO CUTTING OF THE LEG HAS HAPPENED SINCE THE LAST
TIME. WHICH IS A GOOD THING. I AM PRETTY HAPPY WHERE
THINGS ARE IN MY LIFE NOW. MINUS MAYBE ONE THING.
I HAVEN'T REALLY BEEN FEELING SO GREAT LATELY. THEY SEND
ME HOME FROM WORK TODAY BECAUSE I BLEW CHUNKS ALL OVER THE
PLACE IT WAS HORRIBLE. I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON WITH
ME. I HAVE BEEN SICK A LOT LATELY WHICH IS RATHER ODD. I
NEVER GOT SICK BEFORE. WHO KNOWS. I NEED TO GO TO THE
DOCTOR FOR REAL THOUGH. THEY WILL JUST ADD TO MY LIST OF
MEDS TO TAKE.
SO MY SISTER, MOM AND JOHN WENT TO JEN (MY EX-SISTER-N-
LAW) WEDDING BECAUSE WE ARE ALL STILL CLOSE TO HER AND ALL
THAT GOOD SHIT. WELL, MY MOM LET MY SISTER AND I GET DRUNK
OFF ARE ASS. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. MY MOM IS BEING REALLY
COOL LATELY. WE HAVE BEEN GETTING A LONG A LOT. WHICH IS
A BONUS BECAUSE THAT HASN'T HAPPENED IN FOREVER. WE USE TO
BE SO CLOSE. LIKE WE WOULD GO HAVE DINNER ONCE A WEEK JUST
HER AND I. THINGS WERE DIFFRENT THEN THOUGH I GUESS BUT I
STILL MISS IT. THINGS CHANGE THOUGH SO I GUESS I HAVE TO
GET USE TO IT.
RICKY AND I ARE DOING AWESOME. I REALIZED THIS WEEKEND
JUST HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM. HE MEANS SO MUCH TO ME. I HAVE
NEVER LOVEC ANYONE AS MUCH AS I DO THAT KID. SO WE ARE
OFFICIALLY GOING OUT. WE GOT IN A FIGHT FRIDAY MORNING ON
THE PHONE WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL THEN WHEN I GOT HOME THERE
WAS THIS HUGE E-MAIL FOR ME TALKING ABOUT HOW MUCH HE LOVED
ME AND HOW HE COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT I WOULD THINK SOME OF
THE THINGS I SAID. THATS WHEN I REALIZED I WAS BEING A
PIECE OF SHIT TO HIM AND I JUST NEED TO RELAX AND LET
THINGS WORK THEMSELVES OUT. I DON'T NEED TO PUSH THINGS
ALONG AND JUST LET THEM GO AT THEIR OWN PACE. I AM JUST SO
WORRIED ABOUT LOOSING HIM. I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I WOULD
DO. I GUESS I JUST FREAK OUT BECAUSE I CAN'T BELIEVE
THINGS ARE WORKING OUT WITH US. IT WAS SOMETHING I WANTED
FOREVER AND I AM JUST NOT USE TO WHAT I WANT WORKING OUT
FOR ME. AND NOW THAT SOMETHING GOOD HAS HAPPENED I JUDT
DON'T KNOW HOW TO REACT. I MEAN YEAH I HAVE HAD SEVERAL
BOYFRIENDS BUT NONE THAT REALLY MEANT ANYTHING TO ME. NOT
LIKE RICKY. I JUST REALLY WANT THINGS TO WORK OUT WITH
US. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. IF I COULD SPEND THE REST OF MY
LIFE WITH HIM I WOULD HAVE NO PROBLEM WHAT SO EVER. I AM
GOING TO SEE HIM THIS MONTH THE 17-19. WHICH I WISH I
COULD TELL MY MOM WHERE I WAS REALLY GOING. I WANT TO TELL
EVERYONE ABOUT RICKY BUT THERE ARE JUST SOME PEOPLE I CAN'T
SAY ANYTHING TO. MY SISTER SAID SHE THINKS THAT MY MOM
ALREADY KNOWS WHICH I WOULDN'T DOUBT BECAUSE SHE WOULDN'T
SAY ANYTING IF SHE DID. I CANNOT WAIT TO GO SEE HIM
THOUGH. I'M GOING TO JUMP HIS BONES WHEN I SEE HIM. ANYWAY
THOUGH
ON THE DOWN SIDE THOUGH. BETWEEN WORK AND SCHOOL I NEVER
REALLY HAVE ANY DOWN TIME. I CAN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME
THAT I GOT TO HANG OUT WITH MY FRIENDS. I GET TO CHILL
WITH LAKIN AND WITH PEOPLE FROM SCHOOL A LOT THERE BUT I
MISS EVERYONE ELSE SO MUCH. I NEVER GET TO SEE JAKE, SARAH
AND JEARMY. BY THE TIME I GET OFF WORK THEY ARE ALL READY
TO GO BACK TO BED OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. THEN WHEN I AM
OFF AND WE ALL PLAN TO HANG OUT IT JUST DON'T WORK OUT THAT
WAY. I DON'T KNOW BUT I REALLY MISS CHILLIN ALL THE TIME.
HOPEFULLY THAT WILL CHANGE. I WILL KEEP YOU GUYS UPDATED
BUT I AM GOING TO GO FOR NOW. PEACE.




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