2003-09-22 23:42:32 (UTC)


taking the train home today there was an ad for the school
of visual arts saying "396 ways to turn your feelings into
i thought, feelings huh. is that what that is, that feeling
to create?
i thought, about what that lady said, "feelings suck, thats
why i drank for 25 years."
i thought about the creative urge and how i love to drink
it away, smoke it away. this bubbling inside of you that
somewhat hurts, is somewhat painful, but feels so good to
get out.... and feels so good when you have a product in
front of you.

thats my happiness, is writing, and its kinda my curse too.

i thought about how much i feel

i feel too much, but theres nothing i can do. its how i
feel. im hyperaware but theres nothing i can do, its how i
if i wrote a little more maybe the feelings wouldnt hurt so
much and id feel a little lighter.