Guava

kiss me, kill me, hold me, thrill me
2003-09-03 23:47:37 (UTC)

Not my day

Today is SO not my day. I was supposed to meet some kids at their
school to wait for the bus from my work to arrive. Well, I went to the
wrong school. I then got to the right school just after our bus. I feel
like such a fucking idiot. I wanted to scream out in frustration. The
good news in all of that is I still got 30 minutes overtime. I figured I
might not get it since I fucked up, but my director was super nice.

On another sad and depressing note I will not be seeing Dave tonight.
We were going to get together along with John and have a drink or two
and chat. Turns out Dave has to show his place off tonight...his landlord
booked a viewing tonight. Dave and Elissa are moving into a new place
soon.

I wanted to cry when I got his voice message. I'd been really looking
forward to hanging out tonight. Maybe this means we can pick a day
that John is busy or something. I hate to exclude him, but I know Dave
kinda wants to see me alone. He choose tonight originally because
Elissa is going to be out with some friends or something.

I have a strong feeling that he doesn't want to hang out with me while
she's around. John brought up the point that Dave might still have a bit
of a thing for me. I kinda hope he does since I don't like Elissa much.

The good news is Dave is going to be out of town a lot the next 2
months. He's flying out on business trips a lot. I think 11 trips in 2
months...something like that. That gives us time to chat like we used to.
I want to be back in the loop and know a little about how his life is
going. It is depressing not to know anything that's going on with him
anymore.

I am hoping that Dave can reschedule for this coming week. Like maybe
early in the week. The sooner I can see him the better. As long as it
isn't tomorrow night. If it's a night I don't have to work the next day
then I can drink a little more. Not that I plan to drink a whole lot
though. I could maybe have 3 drinks instead of only 2 or so.

If John comes then I can't have more than 3 drinks anyway. He wouldn't
want me to drink too much. Especially since he won't drink anything or
maybe one drink. Dave will drink a bunch I bet. That is if he doesn't
have to work the next day.

All I really care about is getting to see him before I go back to school.
It's been nearly 3 months since I've seen him and I miss him a lot! I was
wrong about it when I said I would only see him maybe twice this year.
This will be time number 3 if it happens. That could mean we would
hang out one or two more times.

He said he would try to come over if Cal is going to drink. She said she
might drink sometime soon after school starts. I asked her to wait so we
could drink together. She doesn't drink much if any these days since
she's had some crummy reactions to drinking. Like feeling all messed
up. Anyway.

I am managing to supress tears and deal with not seeing Dave tonight.
It's honestly no big deal, but I miss him a lot. He means a lot to me as a
friend and I care about him more than I should. Oh well, we'll see
eachother sometime. It was great to have a voice conversation with him
today. He has a very sweet sounding voice.

It just occured to me I ought to tell him that, but he got offline while I
was typing this. I'll tell him tomorrow.

I hope everyone else's days are going well.




Ad: