blueswede

gone are the carefree days of summer

So I'm back at college now, adequately moved in at last. I
was without computing ability for the first few days, as my
monitor had not arrived. I would have had it on Sunday, but
the postal union was closed for the ENTIRE WEEKEND. Thanks
a lot, guys. Ah well, I have it now, and although it's not
quite as sharp as my Trinitron, the space advantage makes up
for that. My other monitor could never fit here.

Not having my computer made me realize just how dependent I
had become on this thing for entertainment. I was bored out
of my mind for most of those days, except for exercising, a
few excellent conversations with my roommate, and the time I
spent with friends from my old residence hall. Six of them
got a suite in one of the non-traditional housing complexes,
and it is really nice. I'm very envious, especially since I
came really close to getting into a suite in the even-nicer
housing complex at the far north end of campus. Oh well, I
guess there's a certain natural order to these things; guys
who don't have their shit together socially as freshmen end
up on the old housing quad. I'm hoping I'll be able to get
into one of the other places next year; being right next to
the frat quad isn't the best for getting to sleep at night.

At any rate, classes started today, and I suppose everything
went as well as could be expected. For the third semester,
I have the same CS professor, so if nothing else I have some
idea of what to expect. And my art professor seems a whole
lot more with it than my other one. This 3-D business might
turn out all right after all. If nothing else, we get to do
some metalworking, which really isn't something people like
me should learn. I've already decided I should make a pair
of wristblades for the metal project.

Things are screwed up at the U right now due to a meal plan
restructuring. The best dining hall on campus went from an
"a la carte" structure to an all-you-can-eat arrangement, so
of course it subsequently became shitty, or so goes the word
on the street. So right now, everyone's flocking to the one
remaining a la carte joint, which means it's crowded as all
hell and you have to wait forever. I wish this damn school
would leave things as they are for once. I would not be at
all surprised if the source of their budget problems was the
constant restructuring in an effort to get more money out of
the students. It's such bullshit.

Anyway, I'm back in the rat race, back to the grind. Though
I actually did most of my homework before I started fucking
around with the computer, so that's a good start. Still, my
summer was a glorious time, during which I got healthy, lost
weight, and generally enjoyed life. It was something I had
never really had: the Summer of Dave.

But it's over now, and I have to get back to doing work and
going places at certain times. And to what end? Education,
ostensibly, but in a lot of ways it's all about gunning for
the degree, which in turn is for employment, and unless you
get really lucky, that's all for money. I don't really know
if I'll be able to end up with a job that'll make some sort
of a difference; I guess it depends on how the "tech sector"
is doing when I get out. Though if I really want to do much
that's significant, I should go into research. But even if
I work in a robotics lab someplace, who can say whether the
work I do will be appreciated.

So who knows what the future holds. Maybe once I'm through
with college I'll make my own peace with the world and drop
out. When you think about it, there's really no place for a
guy like me. And as for material comforts, I don't need all
that much; roof over my head, functional plumbing, and just
enough furniture to give me a place to eat, work, and sleep.

Perhaps that's the way to go, perhaps not. Even shitty jobs
can get you what you need, and who knows, I could be a truck
driver or something and not even worry about housing. There
should be more to life than material gain and the pursuit of
women you can't have, but I sure as hell can't tell what it
is. Maybe I just shouldn't worry about it. I could join a
commune or something, see if they know anything about how to
really live.

If I do abandon mainstream society, I should make sure that
whatever I end up doing is personally satisfying somehow, be
it my job or my recreation or whatever. After all, there's
probably more to life than just existence.

This is Dave, signing off.