Queen Bee

Raves
2003-09-03 00:40:52 (UTC)

Seems like forever huh?

It has been like ages since i have written in this thing,
mostly because i forget about it. Well, we're all settled
into the new house and me and my boyfriend are still
together and doin good, im actually at his house right now.
I on the other hand havent been doing as well as i would
have hoped. I havent been happy for a while and some of it
was because i was living with my b/f i mean I liked living
with him but it was just to much togetherness but im also
unhappy about, well im just unhappy. like literally
depressed.most if it is about the way i look. I have lost
some weight over the past few months but no matter how
great people tell me i look it just isnt enough and now
people are starting to tell me im getting to skinny again
but to me i still dont like the way i look, its like im
never good enough for myself and i know i shouldnt think
that way that i should love myself for myself but there is
something wrong with me. I know i have depression and so
does my family but since i didnt have health insurance for
a while there was nothing anyone could do but now that i
got health insurance back i can go see a doctor and see if
i am clinically depressed, which i believe i am, and then
maybe i can finally start felling better. And not just keep
crying for no reason and hating the way i look and thinking
im nothing just because i have a messed up self image. but
i guess other than that things have been pretty much the
same.oh my best friend had her baby in June, i believe.
Little Idis Shane Rapozo, yeah its kind of goofy but Idis
is a family name so hey. but yeah they're good. she finally
dumped her loser b/f (who is the father of the baby) and
she seems to be estatically happy about it and i would be
too, so thats good but everything is pretty much the same,
everyone is doing pretty good it seems like, so YEAH!!
Alright well if anyone has anything to write me feel free.
Adios mi amigos.




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