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oh, ellen...what can i do?

there's nothing aside from you" never really cared that
much for gob, but that song's pretty cool.
yeeeep.....that power outage sure was crazy...today,
drank all day, smoked alotta pot and just chilled. went
swimming a lot, threw trisha in the pool with all her
clothes on, same with leah and bea. meet a few new folks
round the apartment, it was a pretty cool day. i might be
rolling out to the eastside tomorrow. joe said he's gonna
get a couple fifths for me. i gotta pay him for it, but
hey, it's alcohol.
trisha is really starting to piss me off. she's here
every fucking day, bitching about how she has no hours at
work, she gets some, then pisses and moans about how it's
too much. then she has no gas, maybe if she didn't drive
out to westland everyday, she'd have money and gas.
dumbass. whatever, she keeps talking and talking, pissed
off jared, pissed off me, got us two fighting. bitches
about lauren, cause she's jealous like no other. not my
fault i found a girl that makes me happy that isn't her.
if she's all in love with me, fine, but i got
someone.....i hope.
i really don't want to believe lauren loves me, cause i
know ill just catch a swift one to the balls. i guess i
know she does, but im just not sure how to deal with that.
no one has ever really loved me. sure, my mom might have
at one time, but i don't really think she's a fan of me
now. im not too sure about matt. i miss him. it'd be good
to see him, talk to him. i dont know if it's just me,
lauren or what the fuck, but i love her. i can see us
ending up together, we kinda share a same vision of the
future, her's does vary greatly from mine, but we're both
in it. lord knows what's gonna happen. i just wanna ge my
own place out here, make a shit load of money, and chill.
i just want to go forward, move ahead......it's not to
late, to whip it, whip it good....but anyway, i guess ill
just have to roll with the punches and keep on livin. PEACE

mike