just a normal life
2003-08-09 06:26:59 (UTC)

who cares... : )

Hey kids!

Well today was a good day! Went to Mandys tonight and we
all hung out... Ricky was there... ya know the sad thing
is that i think my friends like him better than they like
me! I brought u into this kid i can take you out! just
joking just joking i think its reallycool that they like
him so much its just kinda like...

i dont know maybe i'm even selfish for even thinking it...
it just seems like... how do i say this...I mean i know
that my friends care about me... they really do... i jsut
don't think they really notice when i'm not around...
soemtimes i really wish that i wasn't so quiet.. i mean
they're my friends! and yet my friends are just so crazy
that i just let them be the entertainment and i jsut kinda
watch! It seems like everyone else has such a unique place
ya know... erik is just crazy and always funny no matter
what he's doing... and keith likes to walk around with
blankets.. i don't know lol he's just a funny kid... and
brian soemtimes just has the weirdest things to say when u
don't expect it coming(and he's a good interpretive
dancer!)... and julianne's always saying something lol or
doing something and its usually funny... and mandy's just
loud lol u can't not notice her and if she wasn't there...
i think everyone would notice... and same with kara...
even tho she hasn't been around much lately... we all
notice it cuz shes like the jokingly mean one and she
likes to flirt lol... andlaura.. well trust me guys are
entertained by her... haha... and james is just
hilarious... especially when he imitates mandy... but
me... i just kinda sit there and take it all in!

and when i'm gone... well people just don't really
notice... and when i'm there.. well people just don't
really notice! lol and not taht i'm taht offended by it i
mean i know that i'm quiet and even when i do have
something to say... no one hears my cuz ... i just don't
have a loud voice like everyone else does! i'm just a
naturally quiet and reserved shy kinda person! and blah! i
mean sometimes when its just like me or ju or mandy or
kara or james or just like a few people its different ya
know! i can say things and people actually hear me ...ya
know i think it sounds stupid but its easier for me to be
like retarded and crazy when i'm not with so many other
people that are ... i don't know i'm not making any sense
to even myself right now... so this is a pointless entry i
hope no one is reading it! lol who cares if no one notices
me! i don't feel like feeling sorry for myself right now!
oh well my friends still love me and maybe my uniqe place
is just to be the person who sits there and is quiet most
of the time lol :ohhh well! its fine with me! LIFE IS
GOOD! and sometimes.. when i'm in a bad mood... stuff like
that gets me down... but i really have nothing that i
should be sad about right now... OKAY! so now ... i guess
with that... there's not much else to say... it was a
little weird being around ricky tonight and we didn't
really talk but eh ya know i guess things will get better
with time! so umm yea! Godbless! : )

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