It's ok to be crazy
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2003-08-03 05:34:40 (UTC)

day after day

i just moved to berkeley and life is just flowing into one
big long blur. we have been here for about a month now and
we have no jobs abd no money so all we do is spend all of
our time sitting in our apartment catering to the baby's
every whim and woe. so i usually have no idea what day it
is or what the date is and sometimes what moth it is. i am
just so tired. i find myself enjoying really sad a pathetic
things like going to an interview or going to the free
clinic to get some more birth control get my yearly pap.
all just so that i have someone other than frank and the
baby to talk to. it is so sad how happy i am to have
stupid meaningless conversatioins with perfect strangers
who aren't even going to remeber me when they wake up
toamrrow meaning.
and we are so poor. we have been living on what little
money people can spare giving us and the fact that we have
a $300 overdraft so we have been writting bad checks just
so that we can eat. i don't know i am just ready to be able
to be comfortable. i just want to have enough money to go
to the store and buy my baby a couple of cans of formula
for my baby. i don't want to have to go to the grocery
store with my wic coupons and have everyone around me give
me dirty looks for being poor. its really not my fault.
frank and i are going to school. we are try to get an
education so that we can provide for our baby without any
i just wish they wouldn't pass judgment on us for the
things that we are forced to do to survive.
we are just doing what we need to take care of our son and
ourselves. we wont' do it forever to take advantage of it.
just as long as we need to.