listen to my silences
so hurt i can't even cry
it's time i got this on paper. out loud. so there's no
confusion. and so that maybe i can cry and deal with it.
i've been trying to start typing for half an hour now. and
all i have is the paragraph above. so i guess that those
of you that don't know what it's about can keep wondering.
those of you that know can wonder how i feel. you could
ask to understand exactly what happened inside of me. but
that would take a bigger person than you've shown
yourselves to be. prove me wrong. please. i'm not being
a smart ass. i really want to be wrong.
oh. my car was broken into. took all of my cds. sux.
wasn't the worst thing that happened that day, as is
indicated above. i wish it had been.
and i still can't cry.
final thought: a cut so deep you can't begin to heal, and
everyone around you wonders why you won't feel, but to tell
them would mean that it was real, so you pretend not to
care and you're numb
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