Jenn

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Ezoic
2003-07-25 14:32:22 (UTC)

Long Night.

After a long night of passion, Me and Misty had a very long
conversation..it was about everything.. Im not sure what
time we actually went to bed, but the last time I looked at
the clock it was after 2. I found out that the day I went
to my dads alone, she sat here and read through my whole
journal. It didnt bother me at all...but I knew that some
of the stuff in here would hit her hard. She told me about
some of the things that bothered her when we weren't
dating. She told me about those nights she would wait for
him to fall asleep and she would just lay there and think
about me...That night we invited her to Sam's to watch a
movie and she stole my Bob-the-Builder tooth brush and
chewed on it...she said she knew deep inside she wanted me
back..I knew that. It was February 8th..I can remember
because it was 1 month after I had my tongue pierced and I
changed it to a rainbow barbell. When Sam went into her
mom's room to check her messenger, I pulled on the
toothbrush to bring her near me...and that's when I knew
it...I knew she wasnt happy. She wouldnt have kissed me if
she was happy. I felt bad because Sam walked in the room.
She promised not to say a word. And Im sure til this day
she hasn't. She's good for her word. I respected that in
her. I never meant to hurt her and I hope noone ever does.
me and Misty talked very little then, but when we did..it
was important and out parting always had atleast a hug. She
told me that everytime she saw me with someone that it hurt
her inside...that it wasnt fair. but she said she knew it
was her fault and that I would take her back. Eventually,
walking down the halls and seeing her face was a
pleasure..I wasnt scared anymore. Sometimes, we smiled and
nodded and went on our way...and sometimes we talked. I
especially liked those days when I could hear her bouncing
down the hall running at me and all the sudden I felt her
embrace. She always seemed to know when my class stayed at
the school and didnt go to the site...I saw her during
break and she usually handed me a note..telling me to call
or to come over. It was the weirdest feeling when I was at
my dad's and the phone rang. He picked it
up.."hello...yes...who is this?" He looked at me
wierd..."the mcdonalds girl?" I knew exactly who it
was..but i didnt know why she would call my house. She
wanted to hang out.. Shauna was with her. so..I met her in
somersworth and left my car at my grams...and we went out
to the mall. She told me that "The cat is gone and now the
mice have come out to play." Say no more, say no more. That
was a nice night.
She appologized for pretending. she appologized for waiting
so long. She also told me that if my pregnancy test was
positive...she would have left him alot sooner. Im not
saying I wanted it to be positive...But I want to know why
she would want to be with me if I had a child.
I promised her that I would carry for her...but I am not
sure that I can. I go in for surgery on Aug 29. The doctor
says I can, Id probably have a better chance than her..
But there are always complications. Christopher is a good
name. We havent decided on a girls name.
Ok, well, we're going out for a walk.

~Jenn~


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