brkunsulofglss

would the world stop spinning
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2003-06-17 23:49:14 (UTC)

breakfast at tiffany's

so anyone who reads this shitty journal knows that i have
recently broke up with a girl named aften.. they would also
know that i was maddly maddly in love with her,and she hurt
me over and over again,but i stayed with her cuz i didn't
think i could breath with out her,over the last few days
i've relized just how much cleaner the air is without her
in my life. i called her just to see how she was,since
she'd text me and not replied to my text,but somoene new
answered the phone,a girl that she's been dating for 3
months...keep in mind that we broke up like 2 weeks ago..
two words..... i'm crushed. sooo crushed!!!!!
my heart has never ever hurt so bad over anything in my
whole life...i've cried since 5mins after i found out and i
can't seem to stop. i can't explain the amount of pain i'm
in..to much is going on around me to be able to deal with
this....my best friends mike and josh broke up last night..
i cried for them more than they did...i've never seen love
be so ugly.
i can't do anything right now except try to super glue
myself back together.
i'm lucky to say that i am seeing caela now,jesus she makes
me smile...it's the most wonderful feeling to have someone
there to show me that i shouldn't be in pain for someone
like aften and that i'm a beautiful person no matter what.
knowing fully what she was getting into being with me while
i'm in a state of mind like i am,and already having her own
fears about relationships,makes me think that she's a
little braver than she says. i takes alot to not run from
what i have going on right now.i can offer her no more than
what i am,and what i have inside,trust and honesty and the
idea that this will be what we make it,something wonderful!

a wiser person than myself once told me,the good is what
last and the sharing is what counts,in the end the love and
caring is what will be remembered. i agree.


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