Emily

One More in the World
2003-06-15 16:43:18 (UTC)

These Things Have No End

So, I went to Renee's on Friday. I'm gonna mis her sooooo
much, she's one of my best friends, and she is staying at
the old highschool when the school's split. It's our second
time being torn apart! :-( Hopefully we can stay close
still, we did it one year, hey, why not 3? UH! I hate our
school. Thank God it's summer.
Oh, definitely got high on Friday too. Hmm... I'm going
camping with Nee(Renee), Aryn, and Brittni next weekend
most likely. All my very close friends, we go camping once
a month because they're all staying at the old school, it's
a way to stay together.
I don't want to stop, yeah I get paranoid, but I forget
about everything. But I know I should. Maybe when I get my
bass, it'll be my salvation. It'll save me. Hmm... only one
way to find out. Cause I know if I say I quit it all, then,
come on, we all know that it isn't true, cause I'm sure
I'll do somethings in the future again. My parents don't
drugtest me, and it's not like I do it on a regular basis.
So, I don't know, I'm confused.
I told Freddie EVERYTHING. His response made me cry. Not
because it was hurtful or not what I wanted to hear, but
because it was so incredibly sweet. I started crying. While
I was telling him, I was shaking, I thought I was gonna get
sick. How can someone take over your mind and soul like
that? I found out, he's been trying to be my wonderwall all
along. I told him it wasn't his job to make me happy and he
said "It's somebody's, and I want to take it." I wish he
wouldn't of said that, how can I get over him now? I told
him I want to be happy, and to go with Meghan, he didn't
say anything. I don't know, I feel a lot better getting
that out though.

Bye bye.




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