Cat

Self harming dyke
2003-06-07 13:48:02 (UTC)

back after a long break

Hello. It has been some long months since I wrote here.
Well, I still cut sometimes, but it is under control. I
have a place on a PGCE (teacher training) starting in
September and am trying to sort out a studio/bedsit in
Bristol.

I have been living with my parents on the farm for 6 months
now. I work in Bristol, as a buyer for the NHS hospitals.

What's new? I'm still in my internet self-harmers group.
They annoy me nowadays and I feel distant from them now,
but I am addicted and can't leave. I did try but got too
curious about them.

I visited a friend in Brussels the other week. We popped
into the psych ward where we were, Moliere. It was weird to
be there. Don't know that I really enjoyed it all that
much. I don't want to be there any more, but I miss the
stability of the place...

My si is odd nowadays. I don't crave it. I slip when am
drunk and upset and usually end up cutting really badly and
have to have stitches. I am trying to avoid my arms now and
cut my tummy the past few times. As my GP said, it looks as
though I have had a caesarean. Oh well, I am unlikely to be
showing it to anyone and a bikini would cover it, so it
doesn't matter anyway. I quite like the scars/cuts. They
are part of me. I just wish I could wear short sleeves now
the weather's warmer. But my crap skin means I wouldn't
have been able to anyway, so it doesn't really make any
difference.

I can't think of anything else to write.

Anyone reading this...?

Cat x




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