dazed and confused

Twisted Teenage Years
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2003-05-29 02:26:02 (UTC)

Every time...

Every time I see you,
My stomach go into my mouth.
I feel like I'm falling.
I never hit the ground...
But I always get that feeling of falling.

Every time I hear you,
I can only think
About how much I wish you were here.
I know you will be soon...
But I want you here right now.

Every time I'm with you,
I can't stop smiling.
The grin forms on my face at first,
And then after a few minutes,
It couldn't even be chisled off.

Every time you touch me,
I literally feel the rush.
It's crazy...
I thought I was in love before...
But I've never felt this rush.

Every time you kiss me,
The entire world disappears.
I know that sounds corny...
But as long as you didn't stop kissing me...
The sky could crash at my feet.

Every time we're alone,
I never want anyone else to show up.
I want to have you all to myself,
And I want to be your center of attention.
I just want you to hold me the way yo do then forever.

Every time I think of you...
Just the thought of you...
The thought of 'us'...
I almost want to cry,
Because never in my entire life have I been this happy.


--Side Note--
Added: Friday, July 29th, 2005
I wish I could remember what it felt like to know that he
loved me. He's not in love with me anymore, but we're still
together anyway because I'm too greedy to just let go and
walk away. I'm still in love with him. I still feel that
rush, and after 2 years of it only growing stronger every
day, even knowing that he doesn't fully return the way I
feel about him, I can't just make it go away the way he
did.

And I still think about Seth.

A lot.

And Matt.

Wedding's off, by the way. Brent and I are no longer
engaged, and I doubt we ever will be again. I'm a mistake
that most people only make once. Why I'm still living in
his house and sleeping in his bed - why he's allowing me to
if there isnt anything there when I kiss him goodnight - is
a mystery to me, but at this point, Id rather live with the
mistery than the thought of living without my Brent.


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