Montana bound
2003-05-09 19:27:30 (UTC)

Time to burn some bridges

Well, things finally seem to be going my way. After
school yesterday, Allison came over to check her email.
Some stupid bastard blocked internet access at her house
after he got mad at her, and she doesn't know how to fix
it. I haven't looked at it yet, but I doubt there's much I
can do. Anyway, Mom's violin student came over eventually,
so we took off and went out looking for some fun. I had a
great time. We went down to Elton Park and hopped on the
swings in the rain, then we jumped back into the car and
drove up the canyon a ways. She told me about all kinds of
freaky shit that supposedly goes on up there, and I'm
definitely going to have to investigate some of that.
At school today, Josiah told me that, apparently,
Skeeter and some of the others want me to give them another
chance. He's willing to, but I'm not quite so forgiving.
My life has been SO much easier, simpler, and flat BETTER
since I dumped the old crew that I have no desire
whatsoever to dredge up the past. It's not very nice, no,
but then I'm not a vey nice person. I gave them a chance.
When all this shit was going on, I told them to pull their
heads out of their asses, get their stories straight, and
come back when they were ready to tell me honestly just
what the fuck is going on. Instead of taking hold of that
rope, they decided to try to hang me with it. Spreading
rumors that Josiah and I are gay, whispering that I was
behaving unkindly toward Alyssa, and a torrent of other
such filth.
Well, enough is enough for me. I'm happier now than I
EVER was when I hung out with them during the large part of
the school year. There are no rumors or grudges between
Ty, Casey, Phil and I. If there's a problem, we bring it
out into the open and get it taken care of. None of the
backstabbing shit that went on before. Plus, though there
may be a small amount, we don't BS each other about serious
things. I don't think I'll ever believe another word out
of Skeeter's mouth. I was wading waist-deep in the lies he
was spouting. The one that really gets me now, though, is
his bullshit about taking Kara's virginity. I can believe
that she would fool around in his pants and other such, but
I don't think even that stuck-up "mormon" bitch would go
that far. Notice, even though I respect her values at
least enough to disbelieve that, it ends there.
If they want to try to patch things up, they can come to
me about it, and I highly doubt I'll accept it even then.
I hope they hate me for it; they'll avoid me and I won't
have to worry about it. I'm through with them, and it's
high time they all realized and come to terms with it.
I really just don't fucking care anymore. As I said,
I'm happier now than I've been in way too God damned long.
Am I happy? No, I never will be until I get the hell out
of this God-forsaken state. However, until then, I can at
least find some degree of it within certain people around
me, and those certain people do NOT include the old crew.