Rico

My Gay Misadventures
2003-05-08 01:24:44 (UTC)

Havent seen the light of day in awile....

Damnit to hell...Im tryin to be more peppy lately, but One
thought re-stirs in my head that makes me droop my wittle
head and curse under my breath...Pony. 2morrow is his
Birthday, and it also marks 2 weeks since i last saw him. I
mean, at first i thought i was over-reacting, but this is
goin to far. All my friends say i should get up and leave
his ass, and if he really did care about me, he would have
at least called once. I suppose they're right. But Seeing
how Pony was the Nicest human being I'v ever run
into...something just doesnt seem right...He's never home,
and no one knows where he is...am at the point where i dont
know if im feeling Anger or Worry. I havent been outside
much all week either. Just sleepin 'n stuff. Usually i'd
have reasons to go about my life, like, callin Pony and
makin arangments for us to go places...Now its all gone, so
i dont know what to do anymore...I guess from everyone
else's point of view, Im sounding real Pathetic....maybe I
am at the time being, But I just cant pretend he was never
in my life and move on. Somethin drove him away, and as God
as my witness, I will NOT just up and leave...I WILL find
out what his issue is....Maybe cuz if i just move on, It
would mean I'd feel used. I mean, It just so happen that
right when we finaly had sex, he vanishes. Moving on would
mean i'v accepted the fact the he only played with me
untill he got what he wanted, sex....But then i relized,
Michael isnt very sexual. He wouldnt go through all this
trouble just to get laid. Why else would he introduce me to
all his friends, and...and...UGH!...This just doesnt add
up...He's not a slut, he's not like me, THIS DOESNT MAKE
SENCE!...no one seems to understand that though. This is
why i cant just 'move on'. 2morrow im goin to inquire his
entire damn family if i have to...I will find him. damnit.




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