KKKKatie

Katie's Journal
2003-05-01 03:50:39 (UTC)

My Crazy Dream

I had a really strange dream last night and I'm not really
sure what it means but I think I have an idea. Here goes:

I was jogging through an office building and talking to
all the people that were working. It was like a bulding
where different companies lease out sections and certain
sections were easier to get into that others and the
people weren't always very nice. Sometimes there was
someone running with me and sometimes there wasn't. I
felt like I'd been running forever but I looked at the
clock and it had only been 15 minutes.

I went out to the parking lot to leave and this guy who
was apparently my husband came over and said he was ready
to go home, too. He was a short little balding guy with
thin, blond, curly hair. Not at all attractive and
definitely not my type. He kept trying to get me to fool
around with him and I only agreed to it because I hadn't
gotten any in a long time. I realized that we had never
even had sex, even on our honeymoon. I knew that I didn't
love him and I was upset with myself that I would lock
myself into a relationship that wasn't based on love. I
wanted to get a divorce but didn't want the stigma of
getting a divorce.

We got in the car (a Jeep actually) and got ready to leave
but my husband decided he didn't want me to drive so he
slid over into my seat and tried to push me out of the
car. I remember thinking to myself that he was treating
me like Daniel treated Lyndsey and I didn't want to have
to put up with it. We drove to the grocery store and the
only thing I remeber there was him tyring to get me to buy
fruit cocktail and I tried to tell him we didn't need any.

I think I know what most of it means but I'm not sure.
The part about the jogging is easy. I'm gonna start
running next week when I'm home from school. I'm not sure
why I'd be running in an office building though.

I think the loveless marriage thing is me being afraid
that any relationship I would be in with someone other
than Josh would be unfulfilling. I've been thinking a lot
about that lately and I feel like any relationship that I
could try to be in would be loveless because I only care
about Josh.

The part about the guy acting like Daniel is just me
recognizing that I don't want to be treated like he
treated Lyndsey. And I don't know what was going on with
the fruit cocktail.

OK, that's all for now.

*Katie*




Ad: