this is dead

Heartache every moment
2003-04-29 02:17:39 (UTC)

All I want...

I dunno. Everythings weird. Melissa and I wanna start a
band- but we're both learining guitar- so we'd need a
bassist and a drummer. argh. and then... well i started
writing poems and shit... just doing stuff. and then
suddenly i began to get pissed off, and i got over paul.
quickly. and i dont feel like i like anyone right now...
but i really want to meet someone. really. and i know that
once i start talking to him a lot again ill probably like
him again... and it sucks and i dont wanna. I just wannna
totally stop liking paul, and go somewhere... talk to a
guy and just forget about all other guys. I wanna fuckin
meet someone who i can identify with. someone whos relly
into what i'm into. not partially so its like... some
things... and idk weirdness. but i want someone i can
just... talk to, hang out with. Just have a good time
with, laugh with, all that. At one point I thought paul
was like that... but now i think there are too many people
who like him... and I dont think i can handle it. I really
don't. I want someone who... even if other girls like
him... i can feel like they aren't competition- not like
i'm better than them... just like this guy is loyal and
likes me. yeah right, right? I mean whos gonna find their
dream guy at this age?? well i thought i had on my
birthday... but i guess things dont turn out that way. I
wish they did. All I want is someone who is possibly into
good music and I can talk to easily... and who isn't like
a player or anything. that's it. i mean sure there are
other things that are always cool too like hotness, is
into all the same bands, skates... ya know... but its not
tht important. I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO TALK TO!




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