Str8 Girl, Interrupted

My Life is a Drama....
2003-04-24 05:58:48 (UTC)

Ahhh...heck....

I'm sitting here trying to think of something really
profound to say, cuz I'm in a let's write something great
mood. And...hmmm...I don't know. I really miss Marc and
Chris and wonder what they're doing. I don't know if it's
the idea of them that I miss or actually them. We've been
friends for five years and I'm almost positive that this
is end for us. It's hard to grasp the whole closure
thing. After five years, they just become part of your
life and to then have them gone, it's different. I still
have Josh, which I'm very grateful. Josh and I don't
really have "fights"...we have disagreements. We know each
other. We're alike. With Chris and Marc, it was always
work being friends with them. I always felt like I had to
be something other than myself. With Josh, it's just
easier. Not to say, that easier is always better. It's
just Chris and Marc have always been a challenge that I was
not willing to meet yet AGAIN. I wasn't going to
compromise myself, like I would've done in the past. I was
done being the doormat, and I know they couldn't/wouldn't
like it. I guess, one of us had to make the move to get on
our with our separate lives. I'm sure it's for the best,
but it doesn't change the fact that I still miss them and
think about them. I'm sure I'll always be curious as to
how and what they've been up to in their lives...I only
hope they do the same for me.




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