DayDream Believer
2003-04-20 12:56:20 (UTC)


Happy easter everyone!!
I have a lot of good and bad things to tell about me and my
boyfriend Tomy, like how I suprised him by waking him up
yesterday morning dressed in bunny ears and with a huge
easter egg just for him! It was filled with candy and
chocolate that I know he likes, Jean Paul Gutier parfyme,
and lots of other cool things, all in all I think it coast
me 1000 NOK, hehe, Im so nice:-)

Im terrible for the moment, Im having a good time but can`t
enjoy it. And why? Becaouse of my father.
I have been a lot with Tommy lateley and maybe just spendt
one or two days home at the most before I left to work,
school, the gym or Tommy.
But from wedensday til satturday morning I was home, Tomy
was with my by the way.
It was horrible, the way my father acts, it was not good at
all. But my mother and sisters were nice as always :-)
Me and my mom went for a long drive som I could practice
driving the car and we got to talk a bit.
Im so sorry for her who has to live with him. She told me
that he had told her that he wanted to get en appartment
and get out of the house, but it did not seem like she
believed him. She told me that she has told him that she
could go and live with my grandmorther, she lived in the
hous next door, is verry old and alone afther my
grandfather died last year.
That way they dont have to live thougether, it wont coast
anything, she can go to the farm and he can, and we can see
them bouth, but my dad did not want this.

She knew allready before his surgery that it could lead to
psycological problems, but he`s been this way all the time.
My graddad had the same surgery and he cryed and laught
side by side, the same things happends to women a few days
afther a birth, it has something to do with hormons, but
he`s not like that.
And my mom is so sick and tired form everything that she
has stopped caring, so now hes drinking, but only wine I
believe, but then agen, what do I know?
Buts she`s stil a good mom to us, ans she`s so sorry for
having a home like that, that she is happy that me and
Grace is away all the time.
Grace is a verry soscial person and everyone likes her so
much that they invites her to come with them on holidays
cause she`s so much fun and help.
Im working, at the gym and with Tommy most of the time, som
Im not much home me eather.
But Karoline is, she is helping at the farm and feel thet
she cant go away because they need her,
She won`t invite anyone home cause we never know if its a
good or bad day for my father, and if its bad then its not
fun to have visitors!
Like here the other day when my father told us who washed
his dick when he was at hospital when we was eating!
Tomy was there and I was so imbaresed, so I tryed to make
him understand how stupid it was by telling jokes about how
grows it was listning to this while we were eating, but he
did not stop.

He would never do anything like this if it was his friends
sitting at the table. He`s a whole other person if one of
the call`s, then he`s nice and funny - until he hangs on.
Tommy can bare it, he feels sorry and things some parts of
it is funny. Him mom drinks way to much and his step father
to and his whole family is ashamed of what she put the
We always used to have people coming to out house, but now
we dont anymore. My mom dont think its fun when my father
act the way he does and she dont like playing the perfect
happy family.

Here the other day in a fight my dad said "why didnt I dine
when I should?" and I made me feel something I cant
describe, I feelt sorry for him for feeling that was in the
same time that I thought he was right.
Cause he can be as mean and bad as he wants to and I`ll
still love him. I cant hate him and wished that he was
dead, but still in the same time love him.
He`s my father and I love him, even though he`s a terrible
father and husbond.

Now I wont depress you with my ond man more today, it only
makes me more depressed. Its easter, sonn I`ll be russ and
hopelfully have the time of my life!
No I dont think so, but I hope it will be fun anyway.

Have a peacefull easter!