ultimateEMOgurl

So much for my happy ending...
2003-04-19 22:47:44 (UTC)

Alone with nothing to do on the weekend yet again

Well its the saturday before Easter, and i am alone. And i
get to be alone tomorrow too...well after church that is.
Yes i like being alone...but sometimes i just want someone
here to talk to or do something with. And no i dont mean my
mom. Like my sister. But shes always gone...and i dont
really have any friends i can do anything with on the
weekends. Laila is too far...so thats hard. Sarahs at her
parents. Liz is always busy. And i dont even have anyone to
talk to since Johnnys in portland. I would have gone to
lailas today, but she went to Venice. And i cant do
anything with my sister since she is in North Carolina and
wont be back till next wensday. Im used to being alone
though. Ive had to be alone since i was in elementry
school. So ive learned to do things for myself, and thats
why im so independent. But lately i have just been tired of
being alone. I never get to really do anything. I go to
school, and church...and occsionally go out to dinner with
my sister, when she isnt working, or at school or with
wilson in NC. I know that i cant expect her to be here all
the time, but she wasnt even here on my bday. Sure i said i
didnt care but really i did. But who am i to tell her that
i dont want her to go visit wilson? I know that i wouldnt
want my lil sister telling me that. I think i compermise my
own wants just to make people happy...and i dont mean
sometimes, i mean all the time. And you know i just feel so
ignored. My aunt told me to call her today if i wanted to
do something. I called her...was she home? No...she wasnt.
You know if you tell someone that they can call anytime to
go do something...you should be home. But whatever...theres
nothing i can do about it. Im just stuck here alone...so i
guess i should go and try to find something to do...bye




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