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Tales of things i eat Volume 1
today i ate a sandawich
it was lesbian by trade,
for it told me of its love life
as soon as it was made.
you may find this unusual
you may find this absurd
but then what happened next
i cant express with written word
up i jumped from were i sat
my sandich was alive!
the dyke like snack began to speak
not just one word but five
"How dare you eat me!" said my lunch
and then than it said "whats more,
you strip me of my sandwich rights
you stupid,uh,MAN WHORE!"
"Oh, great" i said "a feminist,
made of meat and bread"
the sandawich let out a gasp
and kicked me in the head
how it did this i dont know
but it did it all the same
it said" if you you opress me once more,
you'll feel my wrath again"
"just listen, chick" i said to it
"i made you and your mine"
i pointed to my belly and i told it
" oh no i wont " she said to me
with hatred in her...uh...eyes
"you cant tell me what to do,
all you men do is lie"
"whats that got to do with it?"
I asked my meaty friend
It started singing Strisand
i knew this now must end
I grabbed that sandwich, took a bite
and then walked in my mother
"I see you made a sandwich,
i think i'll make another."
And so when i eat sandwiches
i think back to that day.
Apposing ideas and eating stuff.
Its the American way.