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Episode 3: A Knight in Shining Assmour
the saga continues...
INT. FLAMINGO MAN'S FLYING FLAMINGO SHIP -- NIGHT
As Flamingo man and his current army of 4 fly through
space, they sit in the cockpit conversing about good times
had by all. They are to touch down on Planet Boobsweat in
less then 5 minutes.
hey agent dirto...pass the steroid cream because my
phimosis is acting up again.
sure thing boss.
Agent Dirto looks for the cream that a moment ago was just
beside him. He looks at Ecuador Boy who is holding an
empty tube and his face is smeared in cream.
Ecuador Boy...did you eat the bottle of steriod cream
But it doesn't have carbs. I can eat it.
They all laugh.
Plus it stretches my mouth so I can suck bigger cock now.
He high fives agent dirto.
e boy...i have two bottles left please stop eating my
ok ok fine.
Jo Jo mama gets up and pulls her boobs out of her top.
JO JO MAMA
so who wants to touch my boobs before we land.
Everyone is surprised and gasps.
You say other things Jo Jo!
JO JO MAMA
Yeah...what? you don't think i can say other things.
I never heard you say anything else before.
JO JO MAMA
pffft...you guys are so lame!
3 Minutes and counting before landing on planet
boobsweat. Please take your seats and buckle up. And Jo
Jo Mama...please put away your boobs.
JO JO MAMA
Whatever girl voice thing.
She puts her boobs away.
Everyone buckles up and awaits the landing.
I wonder what planet boobsweat looks like.
I can only imagine.
Suddenly a bright light is seen through the cockpit
window. Everyone is blinded for a few seconds.
Look! Over there! That's it Planet Boobsweat!
Through the cockpit window is the giant planet of
boobsweat. Actually two planets shaped like boobs held
together by a force of gravity and water that creates a
sort of sweat waterfall between the two planets; hence the
name, boobsweat. On top of the waterfall is a giant
castle built on stilts. It is shaped like a giant ass.
Look...the ass castle. That must be where they are.
Computer...land on the ass castle accordingly.
Ass Castle landing confirmed. One minute till touchdown.
Reentry phase starting in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
The ship starts shaking as it enters the planet's
atmosphere. After a minute or so they land safely on the
water. A dock is just outside the door leading to the
entrance of the ass castle.
Well...we've landed. How you guys feeling?
JO JO MAMA
Besides the fact that my boob just ripped off, im fine.
Jo Jo Mama's boob is floating in the air. She grabs it
and reattaches it.
JO JO MAMA
Ok everyone unbuckle.
Everyone gets out of their seats and they start floating
in the ship.
looks like we need our anti gravity flamingo suits. let's
Suddenly the floor beneath them opens up and disco music
comes on over the loud speakers. Racks of flamingo anti
gravity suits pop up.
EXT. ASS CASTLE DOCK
Out of the spaceship the fearsome 5 emerge.
Flamingo Man first wearing his anti gravity hot pink suit
with flared pants and fitted tee with matching helmet.
Princess Curdina exits wearing 6 inch red stiletto heels,
a black leather mini skirt, all access super inventory
black belt and red pleather blouse with flowers. She is
wearing anti gravity x ray aviator glasses.
Ecuador Boy emerges next in a sand blaster pancho with 4
foot wide sombrero that shoots poisonous darts. He
decides to wear matching yellow shorts with his matching
yellow flip flops.
Jo Jo Mama comes out next wearing a spiked bra, leather
cowboy hat, and a purple g-string. She decides to wear no
shoes. Instead she opts for her mini radio laser bracelet
Agent Dirto emerges last wearing a palm leaf over his
Everyone turns around.
That's what your wearing!
Don't judge me senorita.
I think its kinda sexy dirto! Oh but wait palm leafs are
Enough fooling around lets go.
They all walk to the main door. It is a 30 foot high
wooden door. There are no bells to ring.
So what do we do?
Knock I guess.
They all start knocking on the door.
INT. DR. WISHASS' SECRET INNER LAYER
Dr. Wishass and Mykerty sit at a 45 foot stainless steel
table across from one another. Mykerty's sorcerers hat is
on the table. Dr. Wishass is staring at himself in his
So i hate my hair today.
He speaks louder.
I SAID I HATE MY HAIR TODAY!
Oh yeah I ate pork today too.
Dr. wishass gets up and walks all the way across to
Mykerty sitting 45 feet away.
Next time don't sit so far away from me.
You don't know me!
They hear the knocks coming from the fearsome five.
I don't know. Its your house.
Well can't you do some magic or something and figure out
who it is.
Listen I don't know what your thinking but im not going to
be the bottom in this relationship. I'm strictly top.
Dr. wishass rolls his eyes.
I understand completely. But can you tell me who is at my
Don't get fussy God!
Mykerty waves his hand in the air and a pillow of smoke
develops in front of them. Inside the smoke they can see
the fearsome five at their door.
Already here are you Flamingo Man! Ha...
DR. Wishass walks to his evil inner layer wear he controls
everything from his Super Controller 4500 regarding his
Wow this is cool. So hey if we win this fight thing are
you really gonna get butt implants?
Dr. wishass just stares at Mykerty.
I'll get four just for you.
Flamingo man, dirto, e-boy, jo jo, and curdina are inside
dr. wishass's castle. the large disco ball acting as
chandelier shines on everyone.
Princess and Jo Jo you come with me...Agent dirto and
Ecuador boy you make your own team and search around the
but if im with agent dirto i might want to eat carbs...its
tortilla man just come with me.
Agent dirto shakes his ass in front of ecuador boy.
ecuador boy giggles and pats agent dirto's ass as they
fiesta their way out.
what are we going to do flamingo man?
i think we need to go up these steps and find his evil
JO JO MAMA
i ain't going nowhere.
Jo Jo mama puts on her mini radio bracelet and twirls
around to cyndi lauper.
i guess its just me and you princess.
but my heels...look...they're so large
i can carry you.
Flamingo man tries to lift up princess curdina. they both
fall on the floor.
did you stop going to the gym?
haha...my blubber is touching your blubber now.
flamingo man starts to laugh.
it's true! my loose skin pouch is caressing yours.
suddenly princess curdina starts bleeding lightly.
OMG!!! something is attacking me!
she gets off of flamingo man.
oh don't worry. that was just my ribs. they attack
oh ya. haha. i love ribs.
they start the climb up the stairs.
Agent dirto and Ecuador Boy are searching the many rooms
of dr. wishass's castle. they come upon a jacuzzi.
so agent dirto...tell me something...do i look fat in this
No senor. actually you look muchos caliente.
ok its just because you know i like to look good. you
know i like rice right?
i know senor.
agent dirto bends down to see what the water is like in
the jacuzzi. ecuador boy unclips his palm leaf. it falls
in the pool.
agent dirto gets up quickly holding his genitals.
why did you do that ecuador boy?
ecuador boy starts laughing. he runs around the jacuzzi
like a little school girl.
now you have to catch me.
not if you catch me first.
they run around the jacuzzi slapping each other's asses.
jo jo mama enters the room.
JO JO MAMA
what are you guys doing?
they both stop and look at her.
argentina is fun.
we...err..we were looking for the palm leaf.
JO JO MAMA
you guys are so lame!
she puts on her mini radio bracelet and dances out of the
room to regret by new order.
Dr. wishass is in his evil layer with Mykerty looking at
his super controller 4500. he watches over the monitors.
they are all in my house those syphillictic bastards!
so listen umm...is it wrong that i just jerked off in my
dr. wishass looks around at him.
he shows him the hat. dr. wishass puts his finger in the
hat and takes out some sperm. he tastes it.
have you been eating red meat again?
i thought you wouldn't have noticed.
suddenly flamingo man and princess curdina enter the room.
freeze dr. wishass?
so you've found me again have you?
this time im not letting you out of here...alive!
tune in some other time when i feel like writing episode 4