lmnosoup

Love and its many wonders...
2003-04-14 14:52:53 (UTC)

It's weird...

I don't have feelings for her anymore and still every time
Isee her I get this weird feeling in my chest (I guess you
could say my heart). It's just weird 'cause I don't know
how to describe the feeling. I wonder if she gets it
too...huh...

Right now I think she is kindamad at me because I'm
not hanging around her as much...I'm trying not to make
her feel uncomfortable. That's all.

Max is right...anything to make her happy. There are
parts of me that still think she isn't...but that's okay.

I kinda miss having her around. Not us dating but
things like water fights, wrestling, dumb jokes and stuff
like that. I miss having her as my friend. The way we
were before we dated. It was fun, a lot of fun. Now it
just seems so tense when we are together...like it will
never be the same again. I hate the feeling I get when
I'm around her. It's sort of like when...I don't know I can't
explain it.

The other night I felt guilty because I wasn't thinking of
her. Which it's been that way for a while but the other
night it actually hit me that I'm over her. I was actually
forcing myself to think of her until I realized how dumb
that is and then fell asleep.

I don't know...I just miss her as my best friend. Max is
right though it's within my power to say how I feel.




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