It smells like poop over here
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2003-04-04 01:11:59 (UTC)

trying to forget how you've been touched...

...i loved you so i told you, but it didn't matter much."
good god i wish i knew what i was doing, and i wish i knew
what was going on. there was that whole situation with
laura. then devon's post card. then lauren at the bar...i
don't know if i talked about that. so when i got back from
state that one saturday, before i found out laura was lying
to me, i was telling lauren what happened. she said "mike
you have got to be the most clueless guy on earth, you
think girls don't like you, but they do. i know a girl
right now that likes you." but it's true no girls do like
me, otherwise they'd tell me, right? but anyway, lauren
wouldn't tell me who it was. i'm like "lisa would never
like me, stephanie thinks shes gay and tracey has a
b/f...and i don't know any of her other friends after that"
but anyway...
....so she calls me one day and says "mike im in love with
you." i pretended not to hear and says "what?" she
disreguared it. few days later, we're at the bar and she's
wasted, comes up to me and says "mike i wanna make out with
you?" blah blah blah we exchange some convo, i says "so
where you the one that likes me" yes, yes she was....i
think. i don't think she really likes me, i've just always
been nice to her and she's kinda on the rebound from
brando. we have a little chat the other day..."well, im
kinda still seeing brandon, and i don't wanna say 'fuck
you, i don't wanna talk to you anymore' but i still like
you and i don't wanna be seeing both of you at the same
time" (yeah, no shit, that's pretty fucking shitty, plus i
wouldn't go out with her while she had a b/f anyway)
she ended with this "well, whatever happens happens,
and i won't wait for you and you won't wait for me" i have
no idea what that means. few people told me that she wants
me...but if she did, why wouldn't she stop seeing brandon,
they're barely going out...if at all. god damn i wish i
knew what was going on. oh yeah, then i made out with
trisha a couple times....im such a dumbass.

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