not set

Takin out the Trash
2003-04-02 21:57:22 (UTC)

I can't stand it...

I cannot stand it! My mom is fucking ANNOYING! UGGH! I just
want to scream out loud until someone hears me.

My mom and I have had an ongoing battle for the past year
and half probably and it's even led us in to counseling. We
have a cycle where we can handle each other, and then she
goes psycho. Why? I have changed a lot from my middle
school days, and she can't accept it. I like being with my
friends...and she likes me home. It's ANNOYING. She also
really doesn't like my boyfriend of a year and a month and
tends to trash talk him thinking I don't know about it. The
only reason why I can see her disliking him is that I spend
time with him over her. We used to be buddy buddy and we're
not now- and I can see why she would want to direct her
anger at him. Anyway-

The other day I was about to spend the night at a friends
house, and she told me my curfew was 12:45 and that I
couldn't spend the night. Considering we had a dance, and
my regular curfew was 12:30....I was pissed. I argued too.
I said that just because she didn't "feel" like letting me
spend the night didn't mean she could do that. I had done
absolutely NOTHING wrong. Her anger was out of no where.
And trust me, she doesn't even have to talk when she's mad.
I just know by the way she carries herself around the house
and talks to me about anything. So I say- "what's
wrong?" ..."obviously something is bothering you and you
might as well spill it because you always let stupid things
build up, and expect me to read your mind." So she gives me
a list of things like "my room is a mess, I'm never home,
I'm self-centered and self-absorbed, and I it's obvious I
don't want to be at home." Well HELL YEAH- i don't want to
be at home when I have a psycho trying to get all close to
me. I don't want to get close because I attach myself and
then I get hurt when she goes psycho again. So I say "
alright next time something is bugging you, can you just
calmly sit me down and tell me 'this is on my mind, what
can we do about it'." So she said "that's a great idea,"
and she fucking used it to play a game. She calls me all
the time to tell me all the things I need to get done
before I can go anywhere, and I have to call her and tell
her any fucking time I move my arm in to another position
which would make me located differently than when I my arm
was a different way. So I'm getting annoyed...she calls me
first period to tell me that I didn't get my things out of
the dryer and I need to come home before I go anywhere.
GEEZ! I forgot, ok? The house has to be perfect on my part
before I can do anything. It's ridiculous. So now, here I
am all upset...and we're at a point in the cycle where I
just want to be rude and have her leave me a lone, and
she's going to start calling me "mean, defensive, and
hurful." Whatever....it's a count down until the day I turn
18....seriously....and even then...until I fucking leave my
house and out of her control problem.....god...i'm out....




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