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2003-03-17 07:18:15 (UTC)

Flamingo Man Episode 1: Who's Dancing Now Selma?

POW! BANG! POP! WHAH! AWAY!

Once upon a time, in a world far, far, a gay...

EPISODE 1
Who's Dancing Now Selma?

The universe is in chaos. The Republic of Fag-Hags have
had enough of the evil Dr. Wishass and his assless ways.
They have begun a revolution. Led by the magical Princess
Curdina and her fag followers, she has started to invade
the planet of Boobsweat, the home of Dr. Wishass. His
evil sidekick, Ecuador Boy, has amassed a following of
14.5 troops in a vain attempt at showing his master, Dr.
Wishass, his appreciation for him and their cause.

Meanwhile, on the planet Pinknut, Flamingo Man has been
contacted by Princess Curdina to protect her from Dr.
Wishass and Ecuador Boy and their 14.5 troops. Flamingo
Man has agreed to help the Princess in exchange for a back
hair clipping and a night out at Spring Rolls for noodles.

Flamingo Man avenges the death of his boy toy,
Sanchezmeister, who was ripped off his ass and left to
bleed to death by Dr. Wishass. Ecuador Boy did not
participate in this killing. He was busy making yellow
rice.

Flamingo Man is on his way to visit Princess Curdina.


FADE IN:

INT. PRINCESS CURDINA'S WORKOUT ROOM - MORNING

As Flamingo Man enters the Princess' workout room, he is
awashed in the Princess' sweat as she is running on her
rainbow treadmill and sweat droplets are flying across the
room. He is not amused.

FLAMINGO MAN
Princess, I am here for you.

PRINCESS CURDINA
Ya, Ya, um...do I look fat?

FLAMINGO MAN
Well, not really, except there is peanut butter smeared
all over your face.

PRINCESS CURDINA
(LAUGHING)
Oh no that's not peanut butter, that's the semen from my
little fag boy, Peanutty. His semen is made of peanut
butter.

FLAMINGO MAN
interesting.

PRINCESS CURDINA
lets get down to business. we need to stop dr. wishass
and ecuador boy. they want to rid my fags of all their
asses!

FLAMINGO MAN
so i've heard. I am at your service Princess.

PRINCESS CURDINA
good to hear flamingo man.

Princess curdina gets off the treadmill and waves her hand
in the air. 6 towels come flying to her and they dry her
off. she sits in her rainbow plush 12 foot chair.

PRINCESS CURDINA
i am sorry to hear about your loss.

FLAMINGO MAN
loss?

PRINCESS CURDINA
Sanchezmeister.

FLAMINGO MAN
oh. (pauses) thank you.

PRINCESS CURDINA
this must make it hard for you. but its personal now. you
must rid the universe of dr. wishass and ecuador boy.
we're counting on you.

FLAMINGO MAN
im flying to his planet today. i will need an army of
fags.

PRINCESS CURDINA
i have amassed a fag force of 34,765 fags for you. they
are all buff and in rainbow thongs. together they can
dance in a huge force and shake dr. wishass and his fiends
away forever!

FLAMINGO MAN
BRILLIANT!

PRINCESS CURDINA
I am sorry i cannot be of service. my hepatitis is acting
up again.

FLAMINGO MAN
don't worry princess.

Suddenly, the door swings open and DR. WISHASS and ECUADOR
BOY enter the room with giant saws shaped like penises.

DR. WISHASS
The time has come, FLAMINGO MAN!

ECUADOR BOY
Just give up now Flamingo fag. Or i'll cut your ass off.

Ecuador boy turns his saw on.

FLAMINGO MAN
(to the princess)
Hide princess!

Princess Curdina runs into the giant vagina room and uses
her invisible potion to make herself invisible. Flamingo
man turns to face Ecuador Boy and Dr. Wishass.

FLAMINGO MAN
Ha! Two against three. You'll never win.

DR. WISHASS
There's only one of you flamingo man.

ECUADOR BOY
Yeah!

FLAMINGO MAN
Or so you think!

Flamingo man dives into his pockets and takes out two
golden balls. He throws them on the floor and they both
explode in a billow of smoke. The smoke clears and
standing there are AGENT DIRTO and JO-JO-MAMA.

FLAMINGO MAN
And so the story begins...

FADE OUT


Tune in next week for the continuing adventures of
Flamingo man!


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