Brie726

Sex in the City Beautiful
2003-03-15 06:28:46 (UTC)

Strangers with Baked Goods

It all started with a sundress... a cute pink and beige
floral sundress that was long enough to be respectable,
yet showed just enough cleavage to turn a head or two. I
bought it earlier that summer, but was waiting for the
perfect day to wear it. Today was that day. The sun was
shining, the birds were chirping, I had an 11 am class
with the hottest professor on campus. Oh yeah, it was
time to let down my strawberry curls, strap on a pair of
kiss-me-fuck-me shoes, and work that sundress to it's
fullest advantage.

I left my apartment early to allow myself time to enjoy my
morning latte and socialize with the townies on my walk to
campus. That is one thing that I learned really quickly
after moving to. Winter Park: Make friends with the
townies. They are responsible for the entire atmosphere
of the city. Plus, every once and awhile, they'll give
you freebees.

In Winter Park, you basically have two kinds of townies:
businessmen and college drop-outs. Although remarkably
different at first glance, they are united by the same
goal... to get laid by college girls, and make some money
while doing it. This is obvious to most anyone walking
down the street, and since their motives are relatively
clear (or should I say, their lines are transparent),
almost all the coeds know to keep a distance.

Unfortunately, I had neglected to mention a very small,
yet very important group of townies, the homeless people.
Being a wealthier area, Winter Park doesn't have very many
homeless people. In fact, until that morning, I hadn't
seen any homeless people in town.

It was just outside of the parking garage on the edge of
campus. I was walking in my cute little sundress, latte
in hand, when I heard a voice behind me asking me for the
time. Looking at my watch, I turned around and began to
answer, but before I had the chance, the homeless man
grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer to him. With his
free hand, he reached into his jacket, and I began to
panic. To my surprise, he pulled out the most beautiful
pastry I've ever seen. I mean, we're not talking about
your run of the mill Lil' Debbie Zebra Cake; this was
something you could only find in the finest of Italian
bakeries.

Before I had time to think, "What the hell is a homeless
man doing with a pastry such as this?", he had extended
his hand and was offering the pastry to me. While I was
extremely tempted to enjoy this delicacy, I couldn't get
that whole "strangers with candy" thing out of my mind.
Granted I wasn't exactly two anymore, and I don't think a
fine Italian pastry qualifies as "candy," but the
principle is still the same.

Anyhow, I politely declined the pastry and continued to
struggle from his grip while not spilling my latte. To my
astonishment, the homeless man seemed deeply offended by
my refusal. He suddenly turned violent shoving the pastry
down the top of my sundress, rubbing it into my cleavage,
and running back into the parking garage in tears. Moral
of the story? Even if you don't eat them, good Italian
pastries will still affect the way you look in a sundress.

Experience the world, be happy, and live the kind of life
they write stories about...

Brie




Ad: