Cath

Underneath It All

I know that from my last few entries it seems everything's
really great between Ben and me.. And they are, I guess.
It's just that.. sometimes I feel really unloved. Ben often
says that he knows he doesn't always let me know how much
he cares about me. But normally I disagree.. cause,
really.. I guess it's just me being difficult. I've written
the lyrics to So Unsexy in my diary before, and that song
really describes me.. If you don't know the song, you can
read the lyrics here :
http://www.my-diary.org/read/body.phtml?entry=237533

Is it all in my head, or is he partially to blame? I
haven't been able to talk to him this past week, since he
hasn't been at the station. He was supposed to get back
this Monday and I had really missed his vioce, so I was
looking forward to him calling. I thought he was coming
back early, so when he hadn't called by 6pm, I called him.
He answered the phone, and he had been back since 1 pm.. He
had done all sorts of stuff since, like going to the store
to buy chocolate.. and I'm like.. has he missed chocolate
more than he has missed me? Or is it just me? I know one
week isn't all that much, but I had really missed talking
to him, hearing his voice.. So we talked for a while and
then my friend came over, so we had to hang up. He sent me
a text when he went to bed saying that it was great to hear
my voice again, but I dunno.. I guess it kind of hurt my
feelings. Is that ok, or am I being difficult? I didn't say
anything, but it made me feel.. I dunno.. of a lower
priority or something.
I've been listing a lot to a no doubt song.. cause I think
it makes a lot of sense, and I try to snap out of this and
don't act silly..

Underneath It All

There's times when I want something more,
someone more like me.
There's times when this dress rehearsal
seems incomplete.
But you see the colors in me like
no one else,
and behind your dark glasses you're..
you're something else.

You're really lovely
underneath it all
D'you want to love me
underneath it all
I'm really lucky
underneath it all
You're really lovely

You know some real bad tricks,
and you need some discipline.
But lately you've been trying real hard
and giving me your best.
And you give me the most gorgeous sleep
that I've ever had.
And when it's really bad,
I guess it's not that bad

You're really lovely
underneath it all
D'you want to love me
underneath it all
I'm really lucky
underneath it all
You're really lovely

So many moons that we have seen,
stumbling back next to me.
I've seen right through and underneath,
and you make me better.
I've seen right through and underneath,
and you make me better.
Better... better...

For real, cuz underneath it all,
you are my real prince charming.
Like the heat from the fire
you were always burning.
Anytime you're around,
my body keeps staling
for your touch, your kisses
and your sweet romancing.
There's an underside to you
that so many adore.
Aside from your temper,
everything else secure.
You're good for me, baby.
Oh that, I'm sure.
Cause over and over again,
I want more.

You've used up all your coupons,
and all you've got left is me.
And somehow I'm full of forgiveness.
I guess it's meant to be.

You're really lovely
Underneath it all
D'you want to love me
Underneath it all
I'm really lucky
Underneath it all
You're really lovely

You're really lovely
Underneath it all
D'you want to love me
Underneath it all
I'm really lucky
Underneath it all
You're really lovely

No Doubt