caulfield

Exit from Reality
2003-03-12 07:53:50 (UTC)

fuck you moorehead

so i can't feel better if i dont talk about tonight's
events. failure, loss, pain, suffering, insult, apologies,
tears, emptiness and anger. im sorry boone, smith, mauer,
megs, i didnt want it to be your last game, i tried so very
hard, but it didnt work. i guess smittie that the pink
bands didn't work this game. or maybe it was cuz my dad
convinced me to wear my old shoes, or i curled my hair and
we only win when its straight. why am i so superstitious?
its cuz i like to blame the team's failure on lil mix ups
that fucked us over...i am a joke, my bad. or as val would
say, "now there are no more my bad's, season is over." i do
give props to our fans who retaliated to moorehead's chant
of "season is over" with "youre from moorehead"-lol, that
cracks me up, go mg fans. i hope those moorehead girls die
on their long bus ride home. and as to the moorehead guy
fans, the ones that kept saying "belden, suck me off"
during the game: i dont put my lips on hicks, sorry! what
kind of a name is moorehead anyway, um ill take some fries,
a burger, and some more head, thanks. ryan: you should
have been there. the kid could have totally cashed in on me
being all depressed, cuz i needed someone to console me,
but instead hes at the guys game. i know it was his
coaches orders, but come on, represent the jodester.

so im gonna give a lil shout out to everyone who pisses me
off, somewhat like loch's but a bit meaner, seeing as
though i can be a bitch if i want-muhahahaha. first and
formost andrea/missy/shauna/amy-get a fucking life, dont
touch my garage again or ill go ape shit, get away from
ugly fucks like vinnie, mike reynolds, luke palmer, and
actually try and be something, although i doubt that ever
will happen since you've lost to many brain cells from
smoking everyday. also, get some fucking style, dear god i
want to vomit seeing missy mcfatass in an echo sweatshirt,
hunny you're white as a ghost and just cuz you go to osseo,
the ghetto of ghettos, doesnt make you a wankster. andrea,
lose the gut, you know how much it sickens me, and its ok
to have enemies, especially since you really aren't a
sweetheart-its just fake. shauna, have fun at st cloud
state, although i doubt you will get in, i think u need a
GPA higher than 0.3 and i dont think that smoking weed, and
receiving minors is the best for after school activities,
and if for skills, blowing really loud bubbles is all you
can put down, than you're screwed. amy, lose the fucking
voice. do you already have emphysema? and i know that the
reason you cant even make the slutty lil maple grove
danceline, is cuz you look like a fucking daddylong legs
spider, go spin a web, you 8-eyed freak. amanda pieterzak-
hunny i know you have constant vaginal infections from
fucking zach too much, but cutt the attitude, and actually
be nice to people. you haven't been the shit since oakview
met prissy jersey in 6th grade, elementary school is over.
kinky freshman-please stop the trailer trash, maybe join
andrea in an abs class, cuz your stomachs disgust me. i
think its funny how y'all fucked the sophomore guys... you
really think they're jems? for fun, they saw who could cum
the most on a piece of bread-you got winners! lisa-i know
you hate that shawn wants to fuck around with me, but that
doesnt mean you need to go christina aguilara on the world,
and get extentions, and put a pound of cover up on your
hidious face. also, i think nixon wants some of his nose
back. girls that are fancied by the guys i like-please if
you're going to take away the actual cool guys, don't be so
damn ditsy. (now chris dont take offense) but sam-
irrational functions are not irritational functions. wendy-
i know you think youre the shit cuz you work at barnes and
noble, but it honestly doesnt mean you're the next jd
salinger, and i thought it was gay you acted like janae's
best friend, when actually i heard you bitch about her like
10 times behind her back. chilly-no the answer to the ?
isn't 69, and who the hell brings that up in church? have
some fucking respect. but i will give ya a lil slack cuz i
like your mom, and i feel bad about your brother, but
talking about 69ing in church just to make alex and erin
johnson laugh, isn't cool-why you need to impress them? mr
corless-i know you're a gimp, but come on, do you need to
be such an ass? when i walk by you im afraid you'll resite
the lines from scary movie, and ask me "to take your strong
hand." please find a wife so you can actually let my
coaches get tanked instead of keeping your lil rat eyes on them
24/7.

wow, i feel better, sorry for making you put up with that,
and the bitch of me is temporarily gone :) next time ill
give shout outs to every person that means something to me,
just to be fair.

so time to talk about transformations. for most of junior
high i enjoyed being the lil shit. preppy, considered
popular by most, hated by every girl besides my friends,
wanted by a dissent number of guys, and being with who i
thought were good people, just drinking, doing shit, and
being a lil rebel. i didnt really get out of control till
9th grade when i started drinking a lot. note about a
drunk-jodi: whoa wild, she will want to get freaky with
just about any guy, lots of fun, but pretty stupid. so that
was me, and one day i decided to just give head to um
hutton, and then it started to get crazy. you see hutton
said i was like the shit, so then i was like, hey its kinda
fun hearing compliments about "how great you were", so then
i went crazy and did stuff with ryan holland, vinnie, mike
reynolds, russ stone, paul solberg. then i found out the
guys liked my lil trademark ear kissing, so i was like
doing that to every guy. by the summer it was old. i had
this thing called a conscience that was kind of irritating
me. so i just spent my time with lochness, we talked about
how really gay missy, andrea, shauna, and amy are, and how
we werent acting the way we really wanted to be. we became
respectable, stuck more to our values, and broke off from
popularity and meaningless parties. we liked just chillen
with each other, reading, and analyzing things and people.
it took a while to get the loser older guys to stop calling
me, but after a while they got the clue. so loch and i
were quite different, we left our old friends, and acted
more the way we wanted to. so senior high hit. reality
check: mg guys were the same as osseo guys. i started the
year a lil tempted by andrew linde, and i kinda fucked up
there, but i never acted on advances from gust, brandon
barth, marcus preston (ew), luke palmer, dan maceroy, luke
vales (gag me), and any other guy, so that was a more
strong jodi. i think i realized they just wanted a piece
and it was just going to be me being used, which isnt that
fun. so i tried going for different people, hidden secret:
jodi likes non-preppy guys (sorry ryan), shes all bout the
musical, analystical people. so i totally fell for ted
baas. mistake, no comment. then i tried to get with
chris...too late. and i was just losing faith, so i
resorted to ryan schulz. good kid, treats me like a
princess, but i still dont know. while i was still at mg,
i found relief in getting lost in my books, sneaking my
head phones on, writing in my journal, dipping to the
library during class and lunch, looking forward to the site
of ted, and also just being alone. i didnt mind not having
a soul to walk with from class to class. whereas in junior
high i needed some fake friend right next to me, gossiping
about one of our other friends. i hate that. why do girls
do that? i cant understand most girls, which is why i am
only close to lindsay. thats another topic i could talk
about for hours. ok, so not only did i talk about mental
transformations, but guy transformations, so hopefully that
was satisfying. oh by the way, i home schooled cuz i wasnt
feeling all the people at mg, and i was stressed to the
limit. i just wanted to be with lindsay, i couldnt love a
person more than i love her...shes my world. fuck the
people that said we would lose our friendship just cuz we
go to different schools. we're closer than ever.

where do people find comfort? physical comfort, i turn to
my soft pillows, warm blankies, and my favorite teddy.
emotional, i turn to loch, anyone who will listen and
understand*. that's whats important. i think people
become sad cuz they can't find their comfort. they look to
a family member, but they just wont get it. they try a
close friend, but the friend instead of listening decides
to back stab them and dip. they turn to a journal, but
unless it's from the chamber of secrets, it won't answer
back, it won't help. they turn to god, but dont understand
the message. they turn to the person they supposedly love
or pretend to love, and that person just assumes they can
help by touching them. that's not real comfort. comfort
is to be understood. as it says in 1984, "perhaps one does
not want to be loved so much as to be understood." im
sorry for those people who cant find that one person who
understands them. i found it for me, if i didnt have loch
agreeing, excepting, and comprehending what i am about, id
be lossed. shes my comfort. thank you vix.

woofta, i got to get back to homework. 2:04AM is too late.

song of day-satelite by BT (please check out Bt's-movement)

hotties
-Chad: i know i dont see him everyday, but dear god this
kids personality is stellar, and i could talk to him for
forever, plus he's amazingly hot...what a catch. im
jealous of whoever steals him. to the lucky lady: wanna
trade? haha
-ryan: i know he's a jock, but he's still a sweetie, and he
has such a soft body, me gusta.
-luke: wow he's annoying when drunk, and tied down with
jenna, but he's got a cute lil boy face, and i like his
hair, it's kind of crazy.




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