dancedancerevolucion

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2003-03-09 23:25:16 (UTC)

When life gives you cocks, make cockade

so i've decided that im pulling an alex and writing a
journal for absolutlely no reason whatsoever...and and and
im gonna say bofriend in honour of ramono...praise the
lord! jesus christ! joanna got kicked off of survivor!
she's sourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! omg shes so sourrrrrrrr! holy
shit im using so many exclamation points! im so
sourrrrrrrr! so heres what i did last night in case i
didn't see alex, ray, or natalie because i don't think
anyone else reads this curd...

well ray and alex came over...well lets back up a bit
first...alex was supposed to come over with ray to get
DRUNK...DRUNK...one mo time DRUNK...and guess what he
didn't get last night? DRUNK yeah you got it DRUNK...if we
were flowers he'd be a pussywillow...i'd be the kind of
wild orchid that meryl streep snorts in Adaptation that
makes you high...natalie would be a thorny baby blue/pink
rose, ray would be a yellow carnation because he likes
milk, and jo would be a venus fly trap because she eats
insects, and aldirto would be a frog...oh yeah thats not a
flower! silly jann! oh and jonoton would be a maltese
falcon who sucks at building relationships...hmmm so where
was i before i got so rudely interrupted by my flower
tangent? oh yeah last night...well they came over and
thank the lord i had pot and ray smoked it with me because
god knows i would've ripped alex's leg hairs off one by
one he was so sourrrrrrrrrrr! hes so bitterrrrrrrrrrrr!
he wants a penissssssssssssssssss! someone give him a
penissssssssssssss! so yeah me and ray got really high and
that was fun and we played charades and pictionary and
monopoly and nightmare and then we played balderdash and
scattergories...good times! ray had to work so he left
early and then all the fun stopped because i was left with
alex...who fell asleep, became a drama queen, and would
not give me his password to msn messenger so i could
message curtis and be like "hey curtis....your so
sourrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"...ahh that would've been fun...so for
two hours or maybe more i did nothing but eat by myself
while alex drooled on my pillow...i made a whole fruit
salad with yogurt and various nuts...i also peed on some
toilet paper when i went to the washroom and while alex
was asleep i wiped it on his face! good times! so then
natalie came over and i got to have fun again! we laughed
and talked and laughed some more...then we danced and came
up with a routine when renee zellweger came over...shes so
funny that girl! i love her! then we ate more food and
made tea...then i realized that my pretend internet
boyfriend of three years and 5 days goes to york so
natalie can check him out for me like she did my other
prospect jason! the first jason not the new one...he went
to natalies program and natalie met him before i did and
said he was ugly and that was that...hahha jann im not
superficial no your just pulling my leg...hahaha stop it
you know im ticklish! hehehehe...so we woke up alex and he
came to for about five minutes...then natalie left and all
the fun was gone again...so i watched survivor with alex
and that was fun until it was over and i was left with no
fun again and alex who suprisingly fell asleep again! wow
four times in a night! and he was supposed to get drunk!
funny guy! good times! so i fell asleep on the couch in
the basement and had dreams all night of war and iraq
because i left the tv on cnn by accident...that was no
fun! then i woke up to alex telling me to get up...wasn't
i saying yesterday how annoying it would be to have alex
call you and wake you up on the phone? well quadruple that
feeling of annoyingness when hes waking you up in
person! hahahahah you love it! your so sourrrrrrrrrrrrr!
your so sourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! hold on wait a
second.....................................................
(gives face of disgust) your so
sourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
hahahaha so writing right now gave me so much energy whoo!
i think i might want to go out later tonight and get laid
because i've decided today that my no casual sex rule
sucks ass! i started to masturbate while i was taking a
poo and then i stopped and im like you know what...i'll
find a guy tonight to do this for me...yeah...and you know
whats going to happen for sure? now that i want to fool
around im not going to find no guys! when i want them they
don't want me...when they want me i dont want them...i'm
so sourrrrrrrrrrrrr!
BRING IN DA CASHOES!!! (that's cashews but the way alex
pronounces it)
my penis is hard from looking at porn! im so
sourrrrrrrrrrrrr!
two hot guys fucking each other! they're not
sourrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! (well the one guy getting it up the
ass does look a little sourrrrrrrr!)
he's so sourrrr! cuz hes getting a dick up his assss! u
bello di mama!
jann's touching my penis! shes so sourrrr!
omg you guys want a pretend internet boyfriend song ok why
didn't you guys say so earlier!

ATTENZIONE SIGNORI SIGNORI!

Please stand up at this time for the SPOSI SPOSI!

*this is where i come out wearing my rainbow coloured
Melora dress with my brand new Lola Red Tina Turner in the
80's hair do*

Renzo: Thank you for coming out tonight to my wedding! I
love my husband, Chris Sanchez! (looks at chris and points
to him) I love you with all my heart! This one's for you!
(Looks to the guests) And i invite you all to come dance
around me in a circle and throw confetti on me!

(Guests stand up and form a circle moving in a counter-
clockwise direction)

(Cue Orchestra)

Renzo: I call this song, "That we made love!".

There was a time
in my life
where i always thought i'd be alone
but then i met you
and you were the one
who made me forget
all about me

And so I said to you you you
your the one for me me me
and you jumped in exstacy
and that was the night (the night)

(chorus)

that we made love happily
that we made love superbly
that we made love in a tree
and you held me in your arms
and told me you never let me goooooooooo
(yeah that was the night)
that we made loveeeee

so now that we're here
in a place that is so queer
you finally let me know
and your letting it show
that you'll never let me go
because me and you are one

(chorus)

the time has come
yeah the time is near
for us to declare our love
and forget all about our fearrrrrrrrr!

(chorus X2)

That was the night (that was the night)
where we went out (where we went out)
and you held me near (held me near)
yeah that was the night
that we made love

(Orchestra ends)

(Applause)

Renzo: Thank you all for listening! I love you all! and
especially you chris sanchez!

(Blows kisses)

so that was my song you guys...im gonna go and eat more
food now...call me later...

love the one the only
renzo

p.s. my ass is so hot!


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