I'm a girl, not a band!!!
2003-03-08 04:16:12 (UTC)

So Tired

I got 2 new shirts yesterday. Partly for work and partly
for California. I wore one to work today with a long
skirt. I have such a hard time finding clothes that fit,
and it's a struggle to get new ones. I was particularly
pleased with my purchase yesterday.

Then, this morning, I was reinking a stamp that I needed
to finish up the books and lo and behold, I got blue ink
all over my clothes. I'm so pissed. I'm really mad at
myself because I should have known better. I've spent the
last 4 hours trying to get the ink out. It hasn't worked.
I know it doesn't sound like a big deal, I mean, it's a
shirt and skirt for God's sake. But it is a big deal. I
hate that I fucking ruin the few nice clothes that I have.

I think another part of my mood this evening is the fact
that my sister is here before she leaves for her trip to
NYC tomorrow for her spring break. She and her roommate
are going. They brought a video that they had made of
their house at school. As I was watching, I realized how
jealous I am over that. That she was able to go through
more than one year at school. That she has her own place,
is free to come and go as she pleases, that she has her
own life. I'm not at that point. I'm being shown up by my
little sister. Plus the fact that we are total opposites
in many ways. We are like the wrong sides of two magnets,
we just don't mesh.

I'm so tired. I've gotten about 6 hours of sleep total for
the last 2 days. I've been staying up talking to Chris for
hours. I love it. But it means that I lose out on sleep.
And that's rough. I don't like not talking to him, but I
am not sure how much longer I can function on such little
sleep. I suppose we shall see.

I'm still pissed.