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the amazing adventures of me and me
2003-03-07 16:11:24 (UTC)

Screwed in the City part V

My friend Laura is hands-down one of the coolest chicks
you’ll ever read about. She’s got it all---a kick-ass job
as an investment banker, blonde hair, blue eyes, rich
parents, and more friends than imaginable. She’s the girl
who knows every bartender and every stockbroker in the
city. She parties more than anyone I know but somehow
manages to wake up at 6 every morning and work a 10 hour
day. I honestly don’t know how she does it, but she’s
really great.

We were roommates for 3 of my 4 college years and have we
seen and done some crazy shit in our time. She is
absolutely hilarious, and will stop at nothing to get a
laugh—whether it means locking herself in the closet to
fart, pretending she has turrets syndrome in public places,
or performing her ever-popular wood-chipper impersonation
with an apple and an unsuspecting audience.

Laura’s only problem is that she went from having a high
school boyfriend, to having no boyfriend since. That’s a
long time to be looking for Mr. Right. And she is
(rightly so) extremely picky, and has only grown pickier
since college.

Here’s an example of what seems to ALWAYS happen to laura:
Tony, a hot swimmer, and laura were inseparable…hanging out
and drinking all the time, really enjoying each other. But
he wouldn’t touch her. One night after too much wine, they
wound up in bed together. The next morning she was
feeling okay about it….. of course, until another friend
of ours told us that he had slept with his ex girlfriend
the night before and after Laura. He never talked to her
again.

My theory? Unfortunately, the men Laura finds interest
in, love her…as a friend. She has this way with people,
and before she even realizes it she’s chugging beers with
the guys and entertaining them….and blowing her chances of
any of them asking her out. Guys, or at least the guys
Laura has been interested in the past, are quite
intimidated by her. I mean, if she makes the money, makes
the crowd laugh, drinks like a fish, has lots of female and
male friends, and is beautiful….what can any poor guy give
her? At least, that’s what I’m assuming they think.
She would have sex here and there in college and the years
after…but never twice with the same person. And she
didn’t really seem to mind it too much—or at least she
didn’t bother us with it if it did get to her.

SO anyway—years go by, she’s fine with life and going out
every night, and then Sept 11 hits. Laura was in the
world trade center working that morning and literally had
to throw on her gym shoes and run for her life down dozens
of flights of stairs … she was so shaken that she ran
straight to her fathers office in midtown (which is NOT
close to the WTC at all.) She obviously had lots of time
off from work after such a horrible event but that was the
worst thing for her. Laura needs to keep herself
constantly busy, and after such trauma, the last thing she
needed was to sit at home alone all day. She started
having a lot of trouble sleeping, and at one point told me
that she couldn’t sleep at all unless she was really drunk
or stoned. We grew very concerned, particularly one night
after shed been out drinking HEAVILY. I mean, Laura could
barely speak. She went home with some guy before we could
put her into a cab and the next day we find out that this
asshole tried to have sex with her while she was passed
out. Luckily (or unluckily) she woke up while it was
happening and got the hell out of there.

After that I think Laura realized that she needed to go to
therapy. She started going once a week and it really
seemed to help her. Slowly she started to return to her
old, confident, fearless self.

Through the midst of this the last thing on her mind had
been finding a boyfriend. I guess that’s how it always
works though isn’t it. One night, about two months ago,
Laura met this guy named Matt in a bar. They’ve been
inseparable ever since. It’s a whirlwind romance if I've
ever seen one. Next week they are taking two weeks off to
travel together.

I’m so happy for her…but also sad because I know I wont get
to hang out with her as much anymore because she’s falling
in love.

Ah well those are the breaks/




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