Remember to Breathe
Well, tonight went well, in a way. I went to Smith Hall
once again, as usual. Because it was Thursday and I have
no class on Fridays, I decided it was a party night. We
ended up playing drinking games in Brett's room. And even
though I kissed him, it didn't seem to matter because it
was all part of the game. Seems funny how a kiss like
that could mean two totally different things to two
people. What am I to do though? His "no masturbation"
bet is going on 40 days now, as of midnight. I want to be
the one to bring him back into the swing of things. haha..
who am I kidding? I am just a piece of the scenery in the
big party of life to him. But still, for some odd reason,
I keep my hopes up. Tonight I will be heading over there
again for our theme party. "Mardi gras" should be fun. I
just want something to happen. I want him to quit being
so laid back about this shit, and just want me. I wonder
if he thinks about me when I'm not there.
"Waiting here with hopes the phone will ring
And I'm thinking awful things
Pretty sure that few would notice."
"Saints and Sailors"