gtrgrl624

"Little naked me"
2003-03-06 19:04:53 (UTC)

I'd been waiting

I fucked up. I feel awful. Ever since i woke up this
morning, all i had wanted to do was talk to her. There
wasn't enough time to call before school. I had a few
minutes after second block, so i took my last 2 quarters
and ran to the pay phones. I'd been waiting to talk to
her. She picked up the phone, answering it with her cute
little sick voice, my heart was smiling. I only had a few
minutes and we were talking, getting along just fine. I
hate the fact that my brain is fried. I used to big the
biggest pot head. And my memory just isn't what is should
be. I asked her if she's ever been to the Corner Bakery or
knew of it. I had completely forgotten that that was one
of the first places we had ever hung out. I wouldn't call
it a date though, from what i remember i just sat there all
embarassed crumbling the cookie i had gotten. Its not
everyday you get to sit next to a really hot girl, that has
an amazing personality. I remember the lady at the counter
calling us "friend", i bet it was code.. It was obvious
that the 2 of us were out, the counter lady just wishes she
could have a peice of the action... ANywayz... My mind had
slipped up.. and i made a huge ass out of myself on the
phone... I'm such a jerk. I remember now, but its too
late.. I feel horrible... then to try and get her not to be
mad at me for forgetting i was a retard and brought up the
fact that she shouldn't be getting mad at me because she
was the one who cheated and lied to me on numerous
occasions... i'm so sorry... I cried to Casey right after
i'd gotten off the phone... it didn't make me feel any
better. Its so out of character for me to do stuff like
that. i'm so sorry. I'm kicking myself in the teeth,
mentally of course. She tried to get off the phone, i
pleaded with her to stay. I apologized, she probably
thinks i'm pathetic, i kept saying that i was sorry over
and over again. But anywayz i cried. Thats bad for me. I
don't like to cry especially when people can see me. It
attracts fake sympathy and it makes me feel weak.

On a lighter note, i can't wait for my clay ash tray
to harden, i get to paint it and put that glaze stuff on it
after break. Its gonna be cool. lol! still haven't done
my history project, tonight i will. i hope.




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