Life's Like This
2003-03-06 16:04:54 (UTC)

*My Family* {Plus my Tragedy}

My Family:

*My mom: Karen
*My Dad: George
*My sister: Jeanine
*My Aunt: Laura
*My Grandmother: Elinor (mom's side)
*My Grandfather: George (dad's side)
*My Uncle: Gary
*My Aunt: Cheryl
*My Cousin: Joye

Thatz my immediate family (according to me anyway). My
grandfather (on my mother's side) recently passed away of
liver cancer {August 2002 *God bless his soul*}, and I was
devasted. My grandmother and grandfather live right next
door to me, and I see them ALL the time... and it was more
than I could bear losing him. My grandmother and I had
always been very close...but now that my grandfather's
gne, despite all my attempts, she's been very distant from
me...which is hard...but I keep doing everything I can to
help her out and help her thru this.
My grandmother on my dad's side passed away a couple
years back...{1999?}. My grandparents on my dad's side
lived in when we had word of my grandmother
had had a stroke, and was on life support during my last
week of school, my dad and Unlce left and I wasn't ab;e to
say good-bye...which I haven't forgiven my parents for to
this day. My Grandfather decided that he couldn't stay in
Florida, so he came to live between my house, and my
unlce's house (in Webster, Ny)...which lasted about a year
when he decided he couldn't stand my mom or Aunt Cheryl,
and left to Florida again. {He now lives in Leesburg,
Me and my parents were never close. I'd havta say I'm
much closer to my dad than my mom. I've NEVER been able
to talk to my mom...she never brought me up that way, and
being a teenager when it would be nice to have a mother to
talk to, itz hard...always has been hard. My mom has some
kind of depression; my parents don't tell me much, so I'm
pretty much clueless about all that...but it makes her
unstandable... Me and my mom fight ALL the time... I try
to do a lot, to keep her "happy" (which is pretty sad),
but it doesn't normally work very well. Shez always
yelling, and itz really hard to get thru life at home most
of the time...tho recently itz gotten better. I mean, she
never hugs me, or shows much affection...itz just hard.
My dad on the other hand, is always around to give me a
hug, but he doesn't want to hear about my mom, he has to
put up with her himself...I think she mostly gets like
that because her dumbass doctor keeps tryig to take her
off her medicine, and it makes her unbearable. I guess
there's no need to explain more, cuz I'll have tons of
entries about that later...guarenteed.
My sister is five years old...very loud,
undisciplined, and uncontrolable. I love her, don't get
me wrong, but my parents never discipline the kid, and
shez intolerable!

*The Tragedy Beings*
Now, I also have a half-brother and sister; from my
dad's first marriage. My brother was kicked out of his
mother's house becuz he "yelled at his sister" (from as
much as I got out of it.) Well, I don't remember anything
but little clips of things from my childhood up until I
was in 5th grade...I think because of my brother. In
November of 7th grade, {don't ask how i remember that}, me
and my parents got into a HUGE fight about something, and
I brought up how they had kicked my brother out of the
house. Up until this time, I had known NOTHING about why
my brother had just one day left and gone back to live
with his mother. I only had a few brief memories of him:
walking back in the woods during the summer, and suttin
about a swing in a tree, once when he had hit me in the
head with the phone becuz I had tried to call my
grandmother becuz he had done suttin that I don't
remember, of asking him to draw (he was a GREAT artist) a
picture of Jasmine from Aladdin, and my last memory was of
visting him at this large building...him walking out with
2 guyz by him...and then one of the guyz came up to me,
took my hand and led me quite aways away, to a swingset,
and said that I wasn't allowed to see my brother. That
last glimpse of him walking was the last time I ever saw
him. Well, my parents got so mad at me for that, that
they sat me down and told me what REALLY happened to my
brother. big brother, the one who I had cried
over and missed for those years; whom I had looked up to.
My parents sat me down and told me tons of things about
him. Both of them on the opposite side of the table from
me, no one comforting me when they gave me the news. They
said that he was in a mental hospital when I had last seen
him...and that he was gone becuz they had found a picture
of me in his room, with his blood on it and the sign of
the devil. He wanted to kill me. I started shaking so
badly that I almost fell off the chair...and my parents
just looked at me. Maybe this is why I'm so strong
today... I went thru life alone. They told me he had done
drugs, that he had stolen the car a couple times before,
he was a satanist, and so many other things. This all hit
me so quick...and all at once, with no one was
too much; I was so young at the time too.
Well, thatz my family history...I guess itz true that
tragedy strikes everyone, right?